Ang mga kuro-kuro ng isang Patis™

Christmas is 5minutes Away

2011-10-07T06:11:00.001+08:00

It's almost Christmas-less than 3months to go. We need to take the tree outside its box and decorate! As for me, Im praying to spend my holidays with my family. As early as now, I'm seriously craving for chestnuts!!!

Been trying this app from my phone-surely will help me update this blog. : )

Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless handheld

Passwords Make My Mind Ache

2011-02-06T11:05:00.003+08:00

It's been almost 2 years since I last opened this blog.

Worse, I forgot my password here. And to add another misery, the e-mail I used is no longer existing.

I literally tried gazillion times trying to figure out what I used as a password when I first started blogging almost 3 years ago.

Success!

"Starting all over again is not that bad; for when you restart, you get another chance to make things right..."

FACEBOOK

2009-09-07T11:01:00.002+08:00

Hey!

Be my BarnBuddy @ Facebook!

Here's the link to my referral page!

http://apps.facebook.com/barnbuddy/?r=1353066301&src=reflink

hope to see u there!

:)

Not back. =(

2009-05-27T01:13:00.004+08:00

Hey pipol! 2009- i guess i'm not inspired nor my year to write. With just 2 posts (1 hidden) - almost mid month.. pity me. too lazy to write or even check my blog. haha.

I just had my b-day 4 days ago. i wasn't excited. my sister told me, "namnamin mo na, 7 years na lang, 30 years old ka na!" oh God.. 7 years to go. . .

In case, you can find me @ facebook. super active ang lola don. haha.

XOXO,

tentaypatis

"Starting all over again is not that bad; for when you restart, you get another chance to make things right..."

Bye Brat!

2008-11-23T00:28:00.002+08:00

I guess I'm a lucky girl. I got a new job, with a good paycheck (weee!).

New friends, and let me add and emphasize - New CRAZY friends. 1 week passed - with our V&A Training, and we're always laughing like maniacs. It's like we've known each other since forever.

Yun nga lang, patayan sa outfit. Corporate Attire (Business Casual) for 4 effing days a week. Waaaaaaa!!

Kelangan ko magtino at tangalin ang pagiging pasaway mode, dahil hindi uubra sakanila ang powers ko. :

Mykee and She, nasa isang building lang tayo, hindi pa tayo nagtatagpo. Mykee, sana masalubong ulit kita sa elevator... at samahan mo ko maglunch break! Shetot, masalubong kita ulit sa may Fort Bus Station. Hehehe! Thanks for referring me. The best!

Caught

2008-11-18T17:49:00.002+08:00

I thought things are gonna be OK.

My past keeps haunting me.

I thought everyone deserves a second chance.

God, balato mo na sa'kin to bago work ko...

Please...

"Starting all over again is not that bad; for when you restart, you get another chance to make things right..."

OMG

2008-11-06T22:33:00.003+08:00

Huwaaaa bakit nawawala post ko tunkol sa daddy ko?!

Hindi ako mahilig sa poems, at dahil kay She, nainspire ako magbasa...

I Crave Your Mouth, Your Voice, Your Hair

Don't go far off, not even for a day, because --
because -- I don't know how to say it: a day is long
and I will be waiting for you, as in an empty station
when the trains are parked off somewhere else, asleep.

Don't leave me, even for an hour, because
then the little drops of anguish will all run together,
the smoke that roams looking for a home will drift
into me, choking my lost heart.

Oh, may your silhouette never dissolve on the beach;
may your eyelids never flutter into the empty distance.
Don't leave me for a second, my dearest,

because in that moment you'll have gone so far
I'll wander mazily over all the earth, asking,
Will you come back? Will you leave me here, dying?

-Pablo Neruda

Hay hay hay!

Taste of Sin

2008-10-24T00:00:00.001+08:00

I thought you'll be my sweetest mistake. I guess I was wrong coz it was still a fucking mistake.

Due to the extreme pain I have felt for the past few months, I reflected and defiantly said that it will be the last time my heart will be broken. So here I go again, undergoing the same process, growing tired of this same old shit. (No wonder my friends are so overprotective and here I am, neglecting myself...)

So gullible. Stupid.

********

"Lying gently on his arms, smelling the scent of his skin - still lingering in her mind. He felt him move, but oh so gently, not to wake her up. He brushed her hair off her face and kissed her gently on her forehead. Damn it felt so good. She hugged him tightly and whispered words so soft, hoping he didn't hear it..."

-An excerpt from Tentay's memoir

********

Please don't hold back. You said you wouldn't want to hurt me, and I trusted you. I want to believe in us, but you're not giving me that chance. You can laugh, I know I look stupid, but lemme tell you this - you have rejected one great love..

My happiness is an empire of which you could have been a king, where your smile has imposed its kingdom. But for a time my croun of gold turns into gray...

Nalilito..

2008-10-22T22:20:00.010+08:00

Heya, I'm confused.

I asked you if you're pushin' me away,

you told me you don't want me to think that way.

Yet you're giving me every damn reason to do so.

=(

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Heads up why I hate being confused:

"Gemini's living hell is being left in the dark. What is he really thinking? What did he mean by that? These are the kinds of questions that keep the Twins up at night. So, if you want to keep relations smooth, don't assume your Gemini knows what's up. They want to hear it from you, directly. Your consistent unwillingness to change or be flexible may also send this sign packing."

Blogmates EB

2008-10-21T23:01:00.006+08:00

October 18, 2008 - was a blast.

As usual, I was an hour and a half late (buti na lang di ako binugbog ni She at ni Mykee).

Pagdating ko, ang ingay nila. Parang tagal tagal na magkakakilala. Nahiya tuloy ako pumasok sa Trellis, yung mga tao nakatingin. Sumisigaw sila ng Diyosa baka dapat jobos (tenkyu sa translation di ko alam na dye yan. ahah), parang gusto ko lumubog sa kinatatayuan ko non. magkulot nalang kasi kayo buhok din. Hahaha!

She, Mykee, tenchoo sa pakikinig sa mga sama ng loob ko, hindi kayo nagsawa. Pag kelangan nyo ng magkukulot ng hair nyo, andito lang ako. hahahaha!! Doc F, partner ko sa late club. dadalhan ka namen ng Kopitang ginto. Salamat sa paghatid kahit wala akong kwentang nagtuturo ng direksyon. Late ko na sinasabi na dapat lumiko ka. hahaha!! Jham, alam mo na yon! Wag mo na ko sabunutan kung madalas eengot engot ako sa paghandle ng buhay ko, di mo naman ako matitiis eh.. Melissa, wag ka na magtatanong ng mga tanong na napapagisip kami. Pagod na brain ko mag isip. Paranoid na ko sa love na yan.

Ayoko na din ata maniwala sa pagmamahal. Kasi parang tinutulak nanaman ako.. (bukas ko na lang sya isusulat.)

Next time, RedBox na destination naten.

She, Mykee, Doc F, Jamina, Meeee, Melissa

Sama na yung gusto sumama next time. Para mas masaya. =)

"Starting all over again is not that bad; for when you restart, you get another chance to make things right..."

2008-10-16T23:59:00.000+08:00

I miss my KBI Family, ka-dramahan ni Rey, namiss ko lalo...

lalo na nun nabasa ko to entry nya: A Farewell To My Family

"Starting all over again is not that bad; for when you restart, you get another chance to make things right..."

Imbecile!

2008-10-16T23:38:00.002+08:00

I get upset easily. It's obvious. I'm short tempered.

I hate arrogant people. I hate their excessive self confidence. I think it's their way of hiding their own flaws.

!--You ain't freaking perfect and you ain't better than most. You think your looking so fly? Everyone's entitled to be stupid but you are abusing the privilege--

"There's a fucking fine line between confidence and arrogance."
Now, for your fat brain's benefit here's the difference:
Confidence is trust or faith that a person or thing is capable. A person who is arrogant often exaggerates one's own worth or importance in an overbearing manner. Eat that.

It's very tempting when you really want to be with someone to settle for much, much less -- even a vague pathetic facsimile of less -- than you would have ever imagined. Remember always what you set out to get and please don't settle for less. These guys exist because there are a lot of women out there who allow them to. (GUILTY!)

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Guys, a girl can really like you. That's all well and good but it doesn't mean she likes everything about you. Don't be one of those retards. Please.

Ladies, you deserve to be with someone who is nice to you all the time. (I should tell this to myself.) LOL.

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"Hiwalayan na kung di ka na masaya. Walang gamot sa tanga kundi pagkukusa."

-Bob Ong (I missed him too! LOL.)

?WTF, When will I learn.

"¡Eres el rey de mi vida¡"

2008-10-15T23:11:00.005+08:00

Hi. Honestly, I don't know where to start. It's been 2 months. I missed this environment, where I can write my rants and frustrations. A lot of things happened and I can't go on details.

I was screwed, helpless and - oh so lame - the last time I left this blog.

So what's up with that doomed love affair that consumed my sanity?

Let me put it this way:

Everyone wants to be loved and needed, particulary by the person who just broke up with us. I understand (I should). What could be better than hearing from the man who just told you he didn't want you in his life anymore, his sad, wistful "I miss you so much" voice on the other end of the phone? It's validating. It's exciting. It's freaking irresistable. You fucking bet - But resist you (I) must.

A guy says he doesn't want to be with you. Sometimes that guy realizes he's made the biggest mistake of his life, and then sometimes he doesn't. Either way, the only role is to move on with your life, and fast. He can always try to chase you down as you're running down the block.

The greatest thing I've learned:

The only reason he can miss you is because he's choosing - everyday, not to be with you. (Whatever... hahahah)

Being lonely, being alone, for many people sucks. But let me say that for some time, I have realized that being with somebody who makes me feel shitty or doesn't honor the person that I am is WORSE!

---------------------

I've got soooooooo many things that I would love to share to you...

To make it short, I think I'm liking someone. (weeeee!!)

But everything's not so sure..

Well, for now, I'll just enjoy.

Because I fucking deserve it, and I deprived that to myself for a long time.

Goodbye drama. (i hope) haha.

and...

"Life is hard enough as it is without choosing someone difficult to share it with... Coz I already have one as*hole and I don't need another one..."

-Tentay

This will be the start of my chapter II...

In lieu of recent events...

2008-08-16T15:31:00.002+08:00

Sad to say, but I'm facing another trial in my life, and this time, I blew it big time.

I experienced another downfall and was forced to leave the family I have learned to love for the past 14 months. I'm tired - I'm not even done finishing/solving my last problem, and here comes another one. Talk about multi-tasking, but my heart won't take it anymore...

I will not miss AllsecTech, but I will surely miss Kingdom Builders (there's a fine line between the two, believe me). It all started in Ortigas, and ended in Taguig. I won't let this incident and those people who let me go - pull me down. Hence, I will prove to them that they're wrong and I was never guilty. No, I am not.

---Insert personal messages here:

Jham, Eiffel - triplets, you will always be in my heart, for our hearts beat as one.

Mia, Mace, Rackee, Mheldita - we may not always be together but I have learned to trust you and that's what matters. Mia, sino na kukurot sakin at hahawak ng b**bs ko hahaha. Mace, in fairness, labasan kita ng sama ng loob.. Raki, gimik tayo at magingat ka sa pageenjoy mo bruha ka! and Mhel, in that short span of time, you've shown what a real friend is... =)

Rey - Salamat sa di pag iwan. Hindi ko talaga inexpect lahat ng ginawa mo..

Jeff, Sherwin, Ian, Stan, Jenny, Grace, Eder, Cindy, Rogerlyn, Tere, Sunday, Anne, Rizza, Greicia, Eden, Lawrence - Maraming salamat sa lahat ng memories. Web.com @ heart. =)

My ~~SHACK~~ Station =(

From this day forth, it will be a new chapter in my life. I will forever treasure the things that I have learned and the people I came across with. I won't trust anyone easily, coz this is one hell of a fucked-up world.

-----------------------------

In view of the fact of this occurence, it saddens me to inform you that this blog is in COMA (Comatose) mode. It cannot be awakened, fails to respond normally to pain, and does not take voluntary actions. I don't know if it will still wake up, or just die... It's still alive inside, but it appears dead. And hopefully its soul will visit you some time... I'll miss you guys.. = (

"Starting all over again is not that bad; for when you restart, you get another chance to make things right..."

2008-08-14T23:03:00.003+08:00

I'll do a decent update to my blog by tomorrow. (hopefully).

"Starting all over again is not that bad; for when you restart, you get another chance to make things right..."

Barado si Daddy!

2008-08-12T05:48:00.004+08:00

Oh Yes! Happy Monday daw ako sabi ni Eiffel. Actually pinichuran nya pa ako ng mukhang Chinese kasi un ngiti ko daw wala na daw ako mata, singkit na daw ako.

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Masaya lang siguro ang Weekend ko, at ang araw ng Lunes ko dahil (basta sikretooo, hi dodong!) hahahahah.

Wala kasi tensyon masyado sa bahay, in fairness hindi kami nag away ni daddy mashado. bakit?

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*Kakauwe ko lang ng bahay ng 9am nun Saturday, nilalagnat at pagod na pagod...

Daddy: Christina! Nagpramis ka! Tara na, wag ka na humiga direcho doctor na tayo.

Me: Ayoko, masama pakiramdam ko, nilalagnat kaya ako?

Daddy: Hindi, halika na dito yang katawan mo asikasuhin mo baka kung ano na yan, last week ka pa nagpramis! hindi mo na tinuloy

*in short naging sermon on the mount ito! at ayon pumunta na ko kwarto para matulog.

Me: (humiga at pumikit)

Daddy: (aba nakasunod na! susmeyow daddy at mumi at ate sa room, wala ko takas!) BLAHHHH BLAAAH... Doctor... Health... Let's Go... Blahhhhh blahhhh yada yadaaa

Me: Ayoko nga po eh! Masama pakiramdam ko...

Daddy: No! Let's go. Blahhhh (ayon litanya parin)

Me: Alam mo daddy, siguro nung past life, PRESSURE COOKER KA?

*napapikit nalang ako, akala ko kasi papaluin ako ni daddy*

*ayon after that incident, my mom and my sister calls my dad "pressure cooker" and he loves it. He was sweet as candy since then. hindi na sya makulit.

*AKO ANG NAGWAGI! Sabi ko sainyo hindi ako Brat eh... ^,^

Keep the Crisis to Thyself

2008-08-09T05:25:00.004+08:00

Caution:

I can go from 0 to Bitch in 2.5 seconds.

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"My restless and impatient attitude may keep myself from staying with any project for too long.
As clever as I am, I may have a tendency to make the same mistakes over and over again."

*ouch. daig ko pa recycle bin...

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Well, I'm often misunderstood (adik kasi). I can be your friendliest neighbor, and I can be your Damsel-in-Distress-and-if-you-won't-rescue-me-you'll-be-fucked-up. Naaaaah. hehehe.

Actually, I suck expressing my real feelings. Even if I'm super angry, I still smile... And it won't last for an hour... (ibang story naman yung kay ex dodong ko lol.)

If I get silent, consider yourself deadmeat!

-------------

*Ooops, I must have put my personalities on shuffle.

*I'm sick - I got a fever, cold and I think I got it from him, and my tonsils are killing me. Ngo-ngo mode. heheh.

*Happy Weekend. =)

Di to political post, pramis!

2008-08-08T03:56:00.005+08:00

-Pramis talaga hindi sha politikal di kaya ng utak ko yown!-

Kahirapan - eto na marahil ang napakalaking problema naten (ako ramdam ko na eh, wala na ko pambili ng pagkain at beer). Ito rin ang dahilan ng napakaraming kasalanan - Nakawan (dahil sa pera), Dayaan(para umangat), Patayan(dahil nangiisnatch), Sex(dahil walang ibang magawa kundi eto na lang ang past time). Hahahaha.

Sabi nila over populated na ang Pilipinas. Pansin ko nga din eh kasi ang daming tao sa Mall lalo na kapag Sale. Tapos kapag panahon ng pasko naman siksikan sa Divisoria at sa Greenhills. So tama nga silang madami nang tao pero kahirapan? Oh yes, ang dami kayang pang-shopping! Shushal. Hahahahhaa!

Ang naisip namen set-up ay lalaki naman ang manganganak. O ha! hahahahaha. Edi pag nanganak ang lalaki, san lalabas yown? (alam mo na shempre wag ka na pa-cute) ahahah. Edi pag don lumabas, sasabog yown (bawal CS section, basta bawal okay wag kayo pamatay trip). Edi ang lalaki, wala na sya kaligayahan, kaya magpapakamatay nalang sya. Ang ending ng mga kababaihan, eh Black Widow. Bwahahhahaha! Edi mala-One-Child lang ang ending, edi tigil na ang labanan ng simbahan at ng gobyerno! Makakatipid na tayo sa Contraceptives. Nyahahahah!

Edi solve na ang problema sa Kahirapan, Populasyon, at alitan ng Simbahan at Gobyerno sa Contraceptives. (pashensha na gutom ata to eh...)

Pashensha na kung kalokohan lang to, pero may point naman kami ni Jham, diba? (Oh frenship, wag mo pindutin un x button sa taas ng page kundi tutulo sipon mo!)

-----------------

Problema mo ba ang Soulmate?

"No one's coming, so don't kill yourselves ladies, Coz He's Not in Heaven OK?"

Napansin ko lang, hindi naman sa inaalipusta ko mga kalalakihan, importante din naman kayo sa buhay ko eh. lol.

Pasapak pwede?

2008-08-06T04:15:00.004+08:00

I have this thing about my blog - around 4 - 5am LANG ako nagsusulat! after that, wala talaga. I guess my brain is scheduled kung anong oras lang niya gusto mag-isip. Today, I have no intentions of posting something ~~it only means that my brain works for an hour a day and it's not even sure if it will work 7 days a week! lol~~.

Okay, maikli lang to, gusto ko lang i-share itong na-experience ko, errrr 5 minutes ago. Nangingilabot ako, waw pare!

------------

WFM(Work Force Management): Tentay, aux 5 (Coaching Break o petix break) ka na po.

Me: Okay, pero pwede naman ako tumayo sa station ko at pumunta CR diba?
(nagsisigurado lang po dahil madami na ko naka-ipong kaso sa opisina at ayoko na pong dagdagan)

WFM: Oo naman.

Me: Tnx!

*Tumayo ako sa station ko at papunta ako ng CR. Nang may isang nilalang na kalalabas lang ng CR. Nakita ko na humaching sya o Nag-singa. (pasantabi lang po sa mga kumakaen). Basta ang lakas kasi at nakita ko wala sya panyo, kamay lang nya ang gamit nya. OMG diba?

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*Ang sumunod na tagpo ang malupit:

BastusingBata: Hachinnnngggggg!! Sniff Sniff (dinig mo full force talaga, pramis!)

Me: (deadma di kasi ako friendly...)

BastusingBata: Ang taray! Ang kati ng ilong ko! Hmppp!

-SABAY TAPIK SA BRASO/BALIKAT KO GAMIT ANG KAMAY NA PINANGHACHING O SINGA AT PARANG MAY NAFEEL AKO SA DAMIT KO BASAAA!!

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*AYON GUSTO KO HIMATAYIN. hahahahhahahaha! amfness takbo ko ng CR, buti na lang at dala ko alcohol ko. Jusko!!! Kahit ata anong baet ko, di ko talaga ma-take, gusto ko manapak that moment. Huwaaaaaaaa kaso dadagdag nanaman kaso ko sa opisina!

*hindi naman ako maarte. pero kadiri lang talaga. hangang ngayon ramdam ko parin dampi ng kamay nya at kuryente (hindi kilig amp talga!) nangingilabot akoooooooo!

*At least sa Christmas Party, bibigyan ko sya ng PANYO! OMG talaga.

*Pano kung ikaw yon, matutuwa ka ba o mananapak ka?

Kontrabida kay Patis!

2008-08-05T04:21:00.011+08:00

I was born with the privilege of a youngest daughter. I was raised getting whatever I wanted whenever I want it. All the attention a daughter could ask for - was showered upon me more than I wanted. Then it all changed...

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Me: Ipissss ipisssss!! Patayin mo dali!!! (umakyat sa upuan at nagtititili)

TheDarkKnight: I'm not afraid of ipis but I don't want to kill it.

Me: Ipiiiissss dalian mo patayin mo naaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh!!

TheDarkKnight: I don't want to kill it, that's one of God's creations.

*ayon tinitigan ko maglakad ang ipis ng nagluluha ang mata

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Me: Ate! ate! ano nga ulit tawag don sa shell na bahay ng turtle?

TheDarkKnight: Carapace.

*hinimatay

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Me: (sa sarili) Ano nga ulit flag to ?

TheDarkKnight: It's Germany's Flag.

*Barado nanaman!! Feeling magaling nanaman kasi eh!

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Ayon na nga, pakiramdam ko isa syang kontrapelo sa buhay ko. Lahat nalang. Barado talaga ko sakanya. Lalo na kapag pinapagalitan ko sya, kakampi sya ng mami ko!!

Dati ako ang kakampi ng nanay ko, ako ang dahilan ng law office ng nanay ko! pero ngayon iba na pinagtatangol nya!! At pinagtutulungan nila akong lahat kaya pakiramdam ko nagiisa lang ako! Kahit ata magpakatiwakal ako, wala andon sila kay DarkKnight nila!

Sino ba kasi eto si DarkKnight Ko?

Eto sya:

Feel na feel nya noh?

At sino ako sa buhay nya? Ako ang kanyang mortal na kaaway:

Si Joker! Kabooooooooooooom! Why so Serious? (epekto ng pampabyuti nagmukang clown)

Pinsan ko at ako, Ako si Joker na nananakot parin sa ilalim ng kama

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Akala ko ba kaaway ko siya, bakit siya ang bida?

Mom & Dad: (shouting) Ikaw Christina! Bratatatat!! Blabla Yada yada!!

Me: Huhuhu uhuhuh... Huhuhuhuhu uhUHUhuhu

TheDarkKnight: Lolo, Lola, please don't shout at my Tita (sabay akap)

*ayon durog nanaman ang puso ko!

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Pero kapag may oras na hindi ko na ma-take ang ka-sutil-an ng batang ito:

Me: Ikaw! Makulit ka nanaman! (nakaluwa ang mata) Kaharap ang mommy nya

TheDarkKnight: Why? You'll ask me to do 20 jumping jacks? Mommy ohhh!

*tinamaan ng lintek, nawala takot sakin nakahanap nanaman ng abugado

*Pero kung ayaw makinig sakin sila nagsusumbong dahil hindi daw sumusonod!! Hanubayan!

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Pero naging makulay ang buhay namen dahil kay DarkKnight. Ate, buti na lang guwapo anak mo. Kundi... Kundi.... lab ko paren. heheheh to naman.

Ayan kakain daw muna sya halo-halo hehehhe. natural nyang face yan. haha

May dengue na pala sya ng panahon na to sarap buhay pa kami sa hotel. Akala ko puyat lang sya kausap girlfriend nya sa phone.

Ang amo ng face nya no? Mamaya magpapatayan nanaman kami sa PSP.

Showbiz patis

2008-08-02T04:13:00.008+08:00

(uyy sino to, artista? hahaah)

When you wake up and find me gone tomorrow

I just did what we knew I had to do

I'll kiss you softly one last time and say good-bye

--------

I have a lot of fuss and I think I should eliminate one, hehehehhe. Ni-literal ata ni God nun sinabi kong "Keep it coming!" Para medyo gumaan naman ang life. Di na nga naman dapat pinoproblema.

"Minsan kahit ikaw ang nakaschedule, kailangan mo pa rin maghintay, kasi hindi ikaw ang priority"

-Guess who! heheheh. B.O.

Happy weekend! I'll go to the hospital to have a check up ~~coz my parent's gonna bring me to the psychiatrist~~ and then I'll sleep for 30 hours. hehe.

undeveloped...

2008-08-01T04:41:00.004+08:00

I guess I just need a little break from stress. My back is aching and it's killing me... Enough about problems, I just want to share something I have inside my shrimpy brain:

I feel the love, but I guess I'm just not yet into it at this moment... ...and I don't know if ever I will be...

"When great love is rejected, something inside a man dies. So all he can do is run away,where he can meet the girl he'll love second most." - ~~basted na lalaki~~

"You can't love someone for what they stand for or seem to be.
You have to love them for their details,
for the things that are true of them and only them."

- ~~nambasted na babae~~

-------

Ang daling sabihing mahal mo ang isang tao, pero kaya mo ba pangatawanan? Ang tanong nalang d'yan eh:

"Will you still love me in the morning?"

Sorry if I'm making no sense. Shrimpy..

Please God, don't make this a sad story...

2008-07-31T05:24:00.012+08:00

Guys, this one's for real, I need your prayers. 07/31/08 - 10pm PHT

This is it. My happyness is counting on it. I don't want to lose something more that's way important, I can't take another downfall... (This is in relation to my previous post...)

I can't afford to lose these people:

I'm sorry if I've been a pain in the ass or "maldita"

This simply breaks my heart... =(

I really need your prayers... please God... =`( I have learned to love these people...

I can see clearly now the rain has gone...

2008-07-30T04:22:00.008+08:00

"Aba, blooming!"
-A colleague told me.

"Bakit mukhang masaya ka?"
-Another friend added.

Stresstabs. ~~Promotional post po ito!~~

Nah... I wouldn't say I'm not happy, I won't even say I am. Let's just say I've been through hell last week and I'm starting to pick up myself. I've done some realizations - I don't wanna be a bum, no more... (ha? ano daw?)

Yes. I don't want to stay home, jobless. (although I'm already TOSS - Tired of Same Shit).

If ever I'll get sacked (yes, that's the right term), of course there will be pros and cons:

Pros:

*I'll get to sleep whenever I want (Hibernation!)

*Goodbye irate callers

Cons:

*No Money, Big Problems (hirap humingi kay mommy kasi daw di ako nagbabayad)

*My friends, My drinking Buddies... (wala na ko kaaway!!)

*I won't be able to go out anytime (even katapat ng bahay ang mall!)

*No more blogging (basta!)

*24 x 7 argumentation with my dad

*My beer tolerance will be reduced from 2 buckets to 2 bottles.

*My smoking meter will be reduced from 1 pack per day to 2 sticks/week (exag!)

I want to stay.. Please let me stay.. I'm fucking innocent! (desperate measures)

"Ano ba naman yang buhok mo parang walis tambo!"

-Jham a very good friend of mine, told me nung una kita nya sakin kanina (yan ang tunay na kaibigan, walang preno preno!) Pero bumawi naman sya eh, "In fairness, ang ganda mo nga ngayon..." Hahhahaha apir!

----------

"Nalaman kong habang lumalaki ka, maraming beses kang madadapa. Bumangon ka man ulit o hindi, magpapatuloy ang buhay, iikot ang mundo, at mauubos ang oras."

-Bob Ong (nasermonan ako kaya eto't pilit bumabangon!)

I would like to take this opportunity to thank all of my blogmates who left comments ~~longer than my posts~~. Thanks for stickin' around and checking if I'm okay. Maaasahan ko talaga kayo. =) ~~and David's Salon's Mike for my new hairstyle~~(yes artista!)

This is not about f*cking love...

2008-07-25T04:19:00.007+08:00

I have no intentions of writing... I have seen all your comments and I think I'm pressured to write something positive. I just can't... because my spirit's fully broken, I'm fucking screwed. My entirety has been destroyed and for the first time in my life, I'm definitely lost.

I know you'll have the impression that this will be about my doomed love affair. No, it's not - but it contributed to half of my heartaches. (this is the second time I stopped writing, coz I'm crying...) This is just way beyond things that I could handle.

All of these happened so fast... And now, all I could feel is pain and its killing me cause I need to learn how to be numb. I just have to endure all these shit. I feel like an actress, I have to show everybody I'm okay, but sometimes, I simply can't take that role.

I think God over-estimated me. To give me all these trials. It would be different if I had to face my battles one at a time, but to have to fight all these battles all at once just tears me apart. We all have our challenges, I know that. I admire those who can boldly face their challenges and have enough strength left to fight again the next day. I feel like there's just no one up there to listen to me anymore...

----------

Gusto ko tanungin si God, kung favorite ba nya ko o may galit ba sya sakin? Dahil lahat na lang ng mahal ko at importante sa buhay ko, nilalayo nya sa akin... Kahit yung mga taong pinulot ako, bakit parang malalayo naman ako ngayon sa mga kaibigan ko? Natatakot na ko...

Ako man napapagod na ko sa sitwasyon ko. Kahit anong gusto kong bangon gawin, bakit may bagong binabato sa akin? Hinihintay ko din yung araw na nakangiti ako dahil talagang masaya ko, dahil mahirap din magpangap...

Erasin' Rewind...

2008-07-22T05:06:00.005+08:00

I bet you know my life's miserable. You've done it once again.

Your sole purpose in my entire existence is to break my heart. To destroy it in such a way that I would feel the most agonizing pain I have ever felt in my entire life and live through it.

Most people are programmed to go on living with broken hearts. That's what this cruel world is made of - heavy blood pumping on one's tightened veins. Walking with the rush of the wind not knowing where to go. Emptiness with something inside wanting to explode and all you could hear will be shit of regrets. Sounds painful? You fucking bet.

Under these conditions, I should be dead by now. Unfortunately, I am not. I am incapable of dying. I am fucking invincible, goddammit.

Or I thought I was... I am doomed with the ability to feel and each day, I will feel pain. Each day, I will feel the loss... and each day, I will feel this fucking regret.

For those who made a comment on my previous post, thank you so much for sticking with my trashed life. I guess it's still not-a-fucking-okay-day for me.

Napanis ang patis...

2008-07-18T04:20:00.007+08:00

Babala: Emo Post ulet.
Mas maganda kung babasahin nang ang background song ay "Magmahal Muli" ni Say Alonzo kung hindi nyo alam ang kanta, pwede narin ang "Love Takes Time" ni Mariah Carey.

Nagmahal ako - nang sobra sobrang higit pa sa mahihingi ng taong mamahalin ko. Pero hindi pa rin pala sapat iyon. At ngayon nabubuhay na ko sa mundo ng takot. Hindi ko na alam kung sino ang pagkakatiwalaan ko.

Lalo akong natatakot na baka dumating na yung taong hindi ako iiwan ay nabubuhay parin ako sa alanganin at hindi ko nanaman mabibigyan ng pagkakataon sumaya naman ako at maitulak ko siya papalayo. Andyan na sya, nakatanga parin pala ko sa nakaraan. Nagaalangan akong magkamali ulit, mahirap na. Mahal na ang beer ngayon...

Kaya heto, kukuha na lang ako ng bolpen at itatarak sa lalamunan ko.. Kaya palitan nyo na ang background song ng "Hindi Kita Malilimutan.." at paalam na oh malupet na mundo!

--------

"Ayokong nasasanay sa mga bagay na pwede namang mawala sa buhay ko. "

- Bob Ong

Kahit anong iwas, sapul paren eh. (to someone, thank you for understanding...)

2008-07-16T04:08:00.008+08:00

I came from a terrible break up. So painful that all I have ever done was to drink beer and to cry.

Fall in love? That's a hard thing to do.. I'd rather have beer, it makes you warm inside, much like love. then when you had too much too drink, you fall hard. Same thing. But when you have too much love and get hurt, it takes so long to recover while with beer, just sleep then it's over.. Then I said to myself:

"This will be the last time that my heart will be broken...

...because I'm afraid it cannot survive another fall."

I wish all the girls I share my pain with will be happy too, because we deserve it... I hope the next time we'll fall in love, it'll be the damn last time. With someone who is patient enough to love us during our downfall...

"If you can't handle me at my worst..

you don't deserve me at my best..."

I don't know if there's still something left in me.. I'm screwed.

nagmaalat ang patis

2008-07-15T04:56:00.004+08:00

Sampung minuto na ko nakatitig dito sa Create new post pero wala ko mapindot sa keyboard. Sarap tumulala...

Ang tibay ng sikmura ng isang ~~halamang dagat na feeling tao~~ gerl na nawawala sa friendster ko eh... Inday ang masasabi ko na lang ay habang may buhay may pag asa.. basahin mo to kung sakali mawala ka din dito:

A man was in love with an ugly girl. His friend asked him ‘why her?’ then the man replied immediately, ‘ano ka ba? Di ka ba nanood ng bakekang? Gaganda rin yan eventually!’

Pasensya na kung medyo malupet, pero ang sabi ko lang panget ka, hindi ko naman sinabing maganda ako. (sorry maldita mode: ON) Hindi ako takot na malaman ang pananaw mo, dahil sa huli opinyon ko rin naman ang masusunod.

----------

"Masama akong tao, tulad mo, sa parehong paraan na mabuti kang tao, tulad ko."

- Bob Ong

P.S. mirrors don't talk but lucky for you they don't laugh

patis na nagmamatamis asukal...

2008-07-12T04:34:00.005+08:00

Ohmyvegetable thank goodness it's Saturday!

I'll be gone for the weekend... to look for myself (emotera! matutulog lang drama pa eh)

Nakalipas ang linggong ito, bakit parang ang saya ko, hindi kagaya noong nakalipas na dalawang buwan. (Hoy iniwan mo ko tapos ngayon magtetext ka? lumanghap ka ba ng katol? Hinahanap mo nga ba ako o ang kawalan ko?)

----------

Oh para sa mga nag eemo jan, eto ang iiwanang mensahe namen ni Uncle, magbabakasyon muna kami. dibdiban na ito:

"Hindi lungkot o takot ang mahirap sa pag-iisa. Kundi ang pagtanggap na sa bilyon-bilyong tao sa mundo, wala man lang nakipaglaban upang makasama ka."

-Uncle Bob Ong na naka emo mode din ata.

Oh para naman maka-relate ang mga nakipaglaban sa pag-ibig at umiibig, eto naman ang maipapayo ko:

"If you are in love right now and you know that person loves you just as much, hold on to that person as long as you can and consider yourself extremely lucky because some people will go through an entire lifetime never knowing what it feels like to be truly loved..."

-TentayPatis (dumugo ang ilong nang itinype iyan)

Mood: happy

Noong tinoyo ang patis at nagsisi...

2008-07-11T04:17:00.006+08:00

Isa lamang ang napapansin ko, teka, pre-lims na ba? Bakit halos lahat ng ka-hopping ko dito sa blogesperya eh nagsusunog ng kilay at biglang nagtatago sa dilim at nag-aaral? Wala kasi pre-lims sa amen non, Midterms lang at Finals. Kung hindi naman eh namumrublema sa thesis?

Yan ang isa sa malaki kong pagsisisi lalo na nung ako'y tumuntong ng college. Sinira ko ang lahat. Lahat ng bagay sa akin noong panahong iyon ay perpekto. Pamilya ko'y napakasaya at nagaaral ako sa prestihiyosong paaralan (hirap ispelengin ng Tagalog) at basta perpekto iyon. Ngunit pumalpak talaga ako.

Noon naaalala ko pa, hindi ako marunong sumakay ng jeep. Kapag niyaya nila ako maglunch sa mall, ang sasabihin ko pa'y "Ayoko, magagalit ang mommy ko..." at tatawanan nila ako. Shet prubinsyana talga dating ko non. Hindi ako marunong mag bus o mag jeep lalo na't mag LRT o MRT. Sanay akong nakahain sa akin ang lahat.

Hanggang sa dumating na lang ang araw, ako na ang nanghahatak sa kanila upang magbidyoke sa Providence Tower, mag bilyar sa Bilyaran sa Leon Guinto o sa Marlon's at mag pusoy dos. Natuto akong magsinungaling at umuwe ng gabi. (Sarili ko tong desisyon at wala akong sinisisi)

---------

Hayaan na naten iyon. Tama sila. Nasa huli nga ang pagsisisi... Kaya sa mga nag-aaral pa, wag nyo sayangin ang pagkakataon. Galingan nyo. Minsan lang kayo mag-aaral at habambuhay na kayo magtatrabaho. Eto nga pala ang maipapayo ko ng isang dakilang manunulat:

"Dalawang dekada ka lang mag-aaral. Kung di mo pagtitiyagaan, limang dekada ng kahirapan ang kapalit. Sobrang lugi. Kung alam lang yan ng mga kabataan sa pananaw ko ay wala ng gugustuhing umiwas sa eskwela.”

-Uncle Bob Ong (close na kami eh!)

May pahabol pa siya eh... si uncle talaga.

"Mag-aral maigi. Kung titigil ka sa pag-aaral, manghihinayang ka pagtanda mo dahil hindi mo naranasan ang kakaibang ligayang dulot ng mga araw na walang pasok o suspendido ang klase o absent ang teacher. "

Mood: dapat nakinig ka sa mumi't dadi mo eh!

naging suka ang patis. nagmamaasim.

2008-07-10T06:07:00.004+08:00

Nakakainis maging demanding. In short, nakakainis ako.

Kaya siguro ang hirap arukin ng isip ko dahil ang gulo gulo palagi...

O takot lang?

Wala nanaman sense..

Pinagalitan tuloy ako ni Bob Ong, sabi nya...

"Kahit kailan walang maling desisyon. Nagiging mali lamang ang isang desisyon kung hindi ito napaninindigan.."

Hirap talaga intindihin. Bwisit.
Mood: Mad (angry and crazy)

2008-07-09T05:39:00.008+08:00

Of all the comments I have received, this one's simply the best... (About my New Next Big Love Story) ~~kasi hindi nya ko inaway for the first time~~ Anyway, here it goes:

ei gurl..i'm glad that you are happy i just hope that you really are..you know what i mean..

..things maybe lighter now and and it is good that you feel the lighter side of yourself again..

..no one wanted you in the first place to be sad..

i just hope that you are not forcing yourself to any feelings you have..remember fondness is different from love..

..just for you to know it is better to take your time right now to pause and know your real emotions before you get in to it rather than hurry things up and stumble again..

..i just hope you won't take it negatively..i just love you so much that i don't want you to cry and feel helpless again..

..friends for keeps.. :) mwuaahh

July 9, 2008 3:40 AM

Thanks Eiffel :)

-----------

If you got friends like mine, who needs an army? It's like they'll give you umbrella before the rain... Keeping you safe... Pag hindi ako nagyaya uminom, sila magyayaya dahil di daw sila sanay hindi ako uminom ng beer.

They're already enough and I thank God for stumbling my path with them (kahit non una hindi kami magkakasundo dahil sa pagkamaldita ko daw...)

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"Aanhin ko ang isang pag-ibig na lagi akong sasaktan at iniiwan, laban sa kaibigang pinasasaya ako at hindi ako binitawan kahit ~~maldita ako~~ kailan..."

-TentayPatis

Mood: Lucky

2008-07-08T03:57:00.005+08:00

Post # 100 (I survived! well for now..)

I hope my post from this day onwards will be full of happy thoughts. I pray that my past will stop haunting me and move on (finally). It's time for my next big love thing. =) My time to shine.

Right now, I think I'm happy. To have someone to share my nonsense thoughts, my smallest details of my whereabouts. I missed that. I wish this is it! =)

Heavy rains remind me of challenges in life... Never ask for lighter rain, just a better umbrella- and to that someone, thanks for keeping me safe from the rain... and the umbrella of course =) (omg puro smile na to. hahahah!)

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"Ang tamang bagay saka tamang panahon wala na ring saysay kapag wala na yung tamang tao. Ang tao pwedeng mag-adjust pero ang bagay at panahon hindi."

-Bob Ong

So the reply to that will be:

~~If you love me like you tell me please be careful with my heart. You can take it, just don't break it or my world will fall apart...~~

So, I won't hesitate no more, it cannot wait I'm sure. There's no need to complicate our time is short this is our fate, I'm yours... =)

-Jason Mraz

Mood: Itago naten sya sa alyas na " D_r_en_ " =)

2008-07-04T03:58:00.006+08:00

"If your head tells you one thing and your heart tells you another, before you do anything, decide first whether you have a better head or a better heart."

-Albert Einstein

at biruin mo, may hirit pa, pano kasi daw kung walang utak dahil engut at walang puso dahil manhid?

"Kaya siguro namigay ng konsensya ang Diyos dahil alam niyang hindi lahat ng oras gumagana ang utak ng tao..."

-Bob Ong

*ayon oh nagsagutan, kaso pano sila magkakaintindihan?
-------------

Pag isipan maigi. Anyway, salamt at July 4 na, ang dalang ng holiday sa Amerika, di tulad dito puro holiday. walang pasok mamayang gabi!! mamimiss ko blogspot.

~~Hahanapin ko na lamang ang aking Mr. Dream boy this weekend.~~ Magkikita kami ni Dreamboy ko this weekend. =)

Huy! teka kung di mo pa alam qualifications, please, tignan mo, malay mo pwede!! Scroll down. Tgnan mo dali (hindi naman kita pinipilit eh!! medyo lang, please please!)

Mood: engut pantasya lang si Dreamboy!

2008-07-03T04:01:00.006+08:00

Requirements:

---College Diploma

*For those who are still studying, must have no grade lower than A+

(please bring your Transcript of Records duly authenticated by the Philippine Embassy)

---If currently employed, no position lower than Manager with a minimum basic of P50,000.00 per month

---Must be at least 5'7" tall, fair complexion, No tattoos, No piercings, Clean nails and toes

---No Chest Hair

---Must be uncannily witty, charming and full of charisma

---Must possess the following qualities:

*Utmost respect for women

*Knows his priorities

*Able to Manage Time

*Sensitive

*Knows how to apologize

*Not afraid of Commitment

*Knows the difference between Confidence and Arrogance

*Most Important: Loyal, Faithful and Honest

Note:

Failure to pass one or more of the given requirements shall reserve the right to forfeit your application.

For inquiries please call our Toll Free Number:

1-800-ASA-KAPA (1-800-272-5272)

2008-07-02T05:30:00.003+08:00

~~AngHunnietutKuw~~

What else do you want?

Bakit kapag akala ko okay na ako,

bigla kang magpaparamdam,

At sinisira mo nanaman ang lahat.

Hangang ngayon ba naman,

option mo pa rin ako? Ano ba...

-------

Ang sabi ni Bob Ong, pakawalan ko ang bagay na nakakasakit sakin kahit na pinasasaya ako nito, dahil baka dumating ang araw na sakit nalang ang maramdaman ko... Pero bakit kahit puro sakit na lang nga ang natira, hindi parin ako makawala?

Mood: trapped

2008-07-01T04:53:00.006+08:00

06/28/08 - I shall never forget this day. Why? To keep it simple and short, I played in the fountain @ Market! Market! with Jham. No inhibitions, and for that 5 minutes, I felt extremely happy and all I could think of was me getting wet on a Saturday crowded mall. I got stinky, ~~I got dirty,~~ dripping wet, but see I learned ~~(to be happy)~~.

Wala ako pakialam kahit madumi yung tubig na yon. Basta ang alam ko, don ako naging masayang muli.

After that 5 glorious minutes, I felt sadness - again...

-----

"Ang talagang makakapag-pasaya sa atin ay yung taong naging dahilan kung bakit tayo nalulunkot..."

-Doraemon

Mood: planning to do it again lol

2008-06-28T03:57:00.007+08:00

I was riding the cab on my way to the office and heard the The Sunscreen Song (is it a song? or somewhat a speech,and I found some info at Wikipedia). I thought it was just another crap but I had no choice but to listen to the song. It's not bad at all, I must say it actually has sense (unlike those real crappy rapboys uttering shits)... Some things to think about from the song:

"Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine. Do one thing every day that scares you."

-Oh, 20 years from now, I'll be in my 40's. Wrinkles. Fat - lol. I think I have to finish my to-do list now before it's too late.

"Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours."

-Forget the people who hurt you. (hahaha I wish I could start now...)

"Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself."

-I feel like I'm always behind... Madz, Vanny, when will it be us? I mean - when will be our time to shine? (lol.)

"Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how."

-yeah please tell me how. People tend to remember the insults and forget the good things. One miss, you die!

"Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's."

-That's why it's good to take chances rather than to live a life full of "what if's?" (hoy tentay, gawin mo muna bago mo sabihin.)

"Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future."

-When I heard this line, I got terribly scared... I'd rather lose everything but never my family...

"Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on."

-Thank you to the stars who never left my lonely sky..

"Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out."

-Save save save. (tentay wake up, wala ka na pera! hahaha)

"Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85."

-Huwaaaaaaat! I think my hair's dead, anyone who knows how to revive my hair? lol.

And the best part:

"Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth."

Mood: I think I want some popcorn

2008-06-26T01:21:00.002+08:00

“I feel sorry for Big, I really do. Because if you think about it, I was the best thing that ever happened to him. Actually, no. I pity him because I get to walk away and be me, and he has to walk away and stay him, you know? And who wants to be him when you could be me? I mean, I'm smart, I'm funny... I was this, this thing, you know I was it. I was this magic moment. I was the abracadabra. I was totally the "poof" in the relationship. I mean, I've got more "poof" in one finger than he could ever have. I mean, geez, sometimes I "poof" just hailing a cab. So I guess it's better to know now. So I can go "poof" someone else. Someone who deserves me, and not some screwed-up, insecure guy who can't deal with a woman who's got her act together. Now, I'm gonna end up deliriously happy and Big is gonna die old and alone, and I pity him. Really, I pity him.”

-Carrie Bradshaw

I was always there even if you didn't ask me to be there for you. ~~So I guess you're just too fucked up because you can't handle me.~~

Unlike Carrie, I ~~pity~~ loathe you for making me believe all your lies. ~~Pumpkin~~ head.

Mood:

Orange Head

2008-06-25T04:28:00.009+08:00

So yesterday I dyed my hair and I think it's too orange-y and light, but I'm unusually happy about it. After all the different hair coloring products my hair experienced, after all the trouble, now my hair is dead. Lolz. I changed the color and this is the 2nd time in just a month. Poor hair. I want to cut it short. Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the lightest hair color I got in my entire life...

(enlarge at your own risk. lol.)

Wait, I think I should've also dyed my eyebrows? lol. Is that possible? When the sun strikes, I think I look like a walking orange mascot. Or let's say a ~~PUMPKIN~~ head. Wait. I hate the word pumpkin I almost forgot. lol. As I have said, this is the lightest color I got because of my stubborn and unruly ~~head~~ hair so this is a big deal for me. yeah yeah!

Nahh, nothing's so special. Like this day. Just another crappy day doing same shit. I wish everything's just as easy as changing your hair color. Well, I've done everything just to get this desired result. Tried everything, did my best - like crappy luuurv.

----

Gee, I thought I won't write anything about him today. Hmmm. Lucky him coz I still have a space for another shit. I remember now, he's left handed. "Kaliwete" nga. No wonder. Peace out!

Mood: hail the kaliwete's!

2008-06-24T03:40:00.002+08:00

Today's not a good start of the week. Still not feeling okay. Shit everywhere. As usual, life's a mess. I'm growing more confused day by day.

Everything's not good. I'm not fucking okay so don't ask me how the fucking hell am I doing. Don't be naive. Please don't add insult to injury.

Get a grip. I'm stuck in this rain and I'm getting sick. Anyways, I changed the color of my hair to Oriental Mahogany. I think it's too orange-y and light and I don't care at least it's something new. New is better. This is the second time I changed my hair color in 1 month. Lol. I tried many products and it won't work on my stubborn hair. Thank goodness this one worked. At least I got something to be happy about. I want to show it, sent it to my e-mail via MMS and damn it, it's still not in my inbox. Still crappy.

------

I finally took a moment and I'm realizing that you're not coming back. It hit me and all my dreams were shattered. I looked around and found that you were with another love, in someone else's arms. The smile that used to greet me brightened someone else's day. She took your smile away and left me with just memories. It hurts me more than anyone will know...

I'm just too pissed off.

Mood: (Singing "Don't Wanna Be Your Friend...")

2008-06-21T05:04:00.007+08:00

I wrote this first ever blog post dated November 17, 2006 @ my friendster account.

They say "all is fair in love"- I don't believe that myself. Cause no matter how hard you try, it won't come out enough. You will still find yourself giving too much even if you're uncertain if that will be reciprocated. When you see yourself being stupid and promised to stop, you'll just totally forget to start over again. Even if you don't want to talk to him you'd see yourself dialing his number and eat your pride, just to discover how jerk he was not to realize that you humbled yourself just to confer with him.

So tell me, is all fair in love? Then how is loving someone in convenience? I guess it's when you've realized that you're both flowing according to one's side only. That he will just love you if he wants to in his own free time. When he has other pursuits he'll just put you aside, and comes back after he's no longer busy. Worst is that he'll tell you that he needs space and says that he'll get you back if he learns that he does love you. And then what? He'll return just to hurt you again.

Perhaps that's the reason why I don't consider reconciliation. I may not know it all about love, but why does it make people act stupidly? And why are some so insensitive that they take for granted those who really love them unconditionally?

In this play of love, should there always be the role of "The Insensitive" and "The Martyr?"

--------

I made this comment on his friendster last 09/17/2006 4:33 am

You've been gone for a while and there are things that I've been missing a lot. Too bad that all I can do is just to remember

How your nose wrinkles each time you laugh when I wish I could pinch it..
How your face glows in the morning and kiss you..
How you sleep like an angel yet snore loudly..
How u sing on the phone that you no longer do..
How you wake me in the morning and I speak Chinese.
How we argue which channel to watch..
How I snatch your last bite of ensaymada..
How you still look so enticing even though we're fighting..
How I catch you watching me sleep..
How you take advantage of my lipstick and put it on my face if I lose when we play pusoy dos..

It would take me years to tell you the things that I miss about us. I may not know until when will I yearn for these, but one thing's for sure, that I will love you until my heart says so..

I guess my sky is still bright without my sun. Thanks to my shining stars called friends, my sky is not empty at all...

See you all on Monday! For me, it's another drinking session with Lala this weekend.

Mood: Thankful for the stars who never left my sky

2008-06-20T03:33:00.004+08:00

Friday. For me it's not T.G.I.F.

I hate Tuesdays and Fridays... Because during these days that I feel so alone... and because it's supposedly our day together..

He's currently here and I don't know when he'll go back to his motherland... But I hope we'll get the chance for us to talk, for me to forgive him and let go. It's still killing me. I hope I'll stop now. It's like I'm dying over and over again for almost 2 months now...

I miss the way he sleeps and snore like a pig. I miss snatching his last bite of food. I miss kissing his nose.. But now I hate him for all the lies knowing that I was such a fool for him..

I have waited for him each time he's in his motherland, the one who was crying each time he'll leave again... I'll no longer see how the sunshine reflects the sides of his nose..

To his new rainbow, I won't take back our sun back in my sky. I guess the sky doesn't need the sun all the time... I'll just sit here and wait for my sunny day...

Mood: looking for my sun

2008-06-19T01:29:00.005+08:00

I can't think of anything to write about. I'm too stressed today. I don't feel okay and bad words keep coming out of my mouth.

Too cranky, too lazy to move, too tired to force a smile and too many irate callers adding to my life's mess.

The root of all evil, root of my grouchiness is him. Feeling hopeless. Hearing for the millionth time that it's his loss not mine. But that someone is my sun, and now he's in somebody else's sky... And it seems like there's a rainbow of joy between my sun and his new sky. Unlike ours, it was always a cloudy day.

Please tell me how to forgive you because I have to let go...

Mood: trying to let go

2008-06-18T00:30:00.009+08:00

Lord, sorry for not trusting you and thinking you left me...

Lord, thank you for answering my prayers and for taking care of me.. (He texted me to say he's sorry, but it's not enough.. hay contentment... I wish it's that easy to do..)

No happily never after, That just ain't for me, because finally I know I deserve better after all. I'll never let another teardrop fall..

"Pakawalan mo yung mga bagay na nakakasakit sayo kahit na pinasasaya ka nito. Wag mong hintayin yung araw na sakit na lang ang nararamdaman mo at iniwan ka na ng kasiyahan mo."

-Bob Ong

2008-06-17T03:05:00.004+08:00

I was the one who loved him most, but between us he lost more... for someday I can love someone the way I loved him, but he will never be loved again the way that I did.

I'll wait for that morning when my first thoughts are no longer of him.. then I would realize that I had already let him go.. It may not be the best sunrise, but I will go through the day knowing that my sunset will be better for I know, I am no longer hurting..

Sometimes, people just ignore because you are simply not their loss, then you just shut your mouth for the fear that no one's willing to listen. If they listen, it's their ears, not their hearts.

Tell me how does it feel when your passion becomes your frustration? When a friend suddenly becomes a stranger. When your optimism fails you and pessimism stands out. When your greatest dream gives you nightmares.

When the one you love talks shits...

It's pretty funny how good things deteriorate good things.

Everyday, I wished for the same thing - for someone to love and will love me back.

Today, I wish for something else - for the wisdom and maturity to realize that I won't find what I want by looking for it. Not to expect someone else to give me the love that I never gave myself. I am not a half, wanting to be made whole.. and even if that special person never comes along, I'll be just fine.

De-Luscious

2008-06-17T02:17:00.004+08:00

It's hard to find a good lipstick. My lips always gets chappy or dry so I need to use lipgloss instead. I'm not a lipgloss fan because they feel so sticky. Eeew. But I want 'em to look shinylicious. YummYummm..

Thank you Avon. Meet Glazewear Lipstick:

It's lipstick and lipgloss in one! AyluvIt! You apply it and it's deliciously and lusciously shiny and doesn't make my lips dry.

Anyhows, thanks Eden, I got my new Glazewear lipstick in Rose Glow today. (My first Glazewear said goodbye in just 2 weeks lol.)

Mood: hungry

2008-06-14T05:10:00.010+08:00

I'm sure I'm not being rude, but it's just your attitude.

It's tearing me apart, It's ruining everything.

I swore I would be true, and Hunnie, so did you.

So why were you holding her hand? Is that the way we stand?

Were you lying all the time? Was it just a game to you?

I thought the world of you. I thought nothing could go wrong

But I was wrong.

If you could get by, trying not to lie,

Things wouldn't be so confused and I wouldn't feel so used,

But you always really knew, I just wanna be with you.

But I'm missing you.

...you know I'm such a fool for you

~~Hunnie 041105~~

Mood: sad

C.D.M.A.

2008-06-13T07:08:00.003+08:00

I wanna talk to you.. yun lang..

you should know who you are.

Kelangang ganito, ang labo eh.

I know your happy pero I think I deserve an explanation.

Teacher? wala lang. Sad.

Smile Because I Deserve It

2008-06-11T23:12:00.011+08:00

It's been the longest summer without you. I didn't know where to turn to. See somehow I can't forget you, after all that we've been through. Now I realize that I really didn't know if you didn't notice you mean everything. Quickly I'm learning to love again, all I know is I'm going to be okay.

I couldn't turn on the TV without something there to remind me. Was it all that easy to just put aside your feelings? If i'm dreaming, don't want to let it hurt my feelings, but that's the past I believe it. And I know that, time will heal it.

Thought I couldn't live without you. It's gonna hurt when it heals too. It'll all get better in time. Even though I really love you, I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to. It will all get better in time.

Since there's no more you and me, it's time I let you go so I can be free and live my life how it should be. No matter how hard it is, I'll be fine without you. Yes I will.

I'll be just fine. Thank God I'm alot better now.

Better in Time - Leona Lews

(click picture to play or click here)

Mood: won't give a damn

Notorious B.A.G.

2008-06-10T06:34:00.010+08:00

Still looking for stuff on e-Bay. Argh, I think I need to look for another job to get all the things I want. Hay. Here's some of 'em cutieees on my watch list:

Juicy Couture Bags are sooo cute! I saw them at Rustan's and I don't want to let go! But my pocket says Move on! Hahahaha!

Php 6,500.00

Php 6,499.00

These wooden bags are so adorable and very eye catching. I'm not into brands but these are fantastic:

Php 4,600.00

And of course, Tito Louis Vuitton will always be on the scene. Hays. Hate and love it.

Louis Vuitton Watercolor Aquarelle Papillon

Php 187,000.00 Gudluck. Haha =)

Santa Claus, I need you like water, like breath, like rain. I'll be good promise hehe.

Mood: waiting for Santa

Bilyaran sa L.G.

2008-06-10T03:10:00.005+08:00

Last Saturday, after our shift, Jham, Felly and I were all undecided where to go. Home? Inuman? Felly gave me 1 minute to decide (oh ha, sign ng grumpiness nya) and we all agreed to go to Felly's house, drink our bestfriend GranMa and Test our vocal limits thru their Videoke.

"Jham gusto ko magbilyar!!" Hay, nangangati ang aking kamay sa paghawak ng tako. Just last Friday morning, we went to Gatson's to drink and play billiards. Hinahanap hanap ko ulit, after years of no playing. Jham agreed. Masarap maglaro ng bilyar. Hayyy. Iba ang feeling. So we decided na sunduin si Buena sa bahay nila at pumunta ng Rolling Stone ng tanghaling tapat. Ayon umandar ang kaengotan namen. Nasanay sa American Time na EST, mga shunga shunga, nagsayang ng gas, sarado amp. Hahahahha!!

"Tara sa BLG nalang!!" And finally, I went to my 2nd home when I was in College. Bilyaran sa Leon Guinto. Kung saan nagsimula ang lahat. Andun parin si Kuya Bonjing na spotter. He looked alot hagard at older pero same face padin. God, I missed that place. I spent most of my college days there than inside the classroom! Bwahahhaha!

Before we played, we went to Houseblend. Hay. As usual out of stock ang Sour Cream Fries na ultimate favorite ko don. Since college out of stock? hehe. Nakita ko din don si Smiley. Oh diba, mga parte ng college life ko... Hay.

Balik sa bilyaran, hinamon ko si Felly dahil natalo ako sa Need for Speed Nitrous event. Ampotah pahiya ako don Felly. huhu. Anyway, sabi ko sakanya, iiyak sya pag naglaro kami ng Bilyar. It was an 8-Ball game, doubles. Felly and Buena, Jham and me. Like sa movies, mga bida nagpapabugbug muna. score was 3-1 in favor of Felly and Buena. Sorry nalang Fel, dumating na ang hinihintay kong araw na luluhod ang mga tala. Ending, the score was 5-9 in favor of us. Bwahahhaha!! Bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh!!

Mood: Bleh ulit!

Mother of Pearl Drive

2008-06-07T06:27:00.006+08:00

After our Thursday shift (so umaga ng Friday), nagkadesisyon, inuman ulit. From Market! Market! we went to our mother homeland of the Pearl Drive Street, Ortigas. Ay sus, ayon, ang aming dating building na alanganin, nagtayo ng dalawang fastfood chain!! 24 hours pa!!! May Mcdo at Jollibee na with Wi-Fi! San ka pa?!

Anyway, bumalik kami sa dati nameng pinupuntahan. Gatson's ba iyon? Bilyar ulit. Tagal ko na di nakahawak ng tako, isang taon na ata nakakalipas. Buti nalang nakakashoot parin. Hehehe. Hay halo halo beer laman ng tyan ko. Una Colt 45 dahil wala nang SMB!!! Jusmeyo! Tapos magbilyar nag videoke naman kami don.

At nang oorder na ulit ng beer, tinry namen ang Coors Light! Pag inom ko. wapak. Walang lasa. Parang beer na nalusawan ng yelo. Di ko ma-feel yon pait. Chineck namen at 4.1% lang ang alcohol content compared to SMB Light na 5%. So, lima kami. Felly, Jam, Mace, Ria, Pam at ako. 24 bottles nainom namen na halos Colt ang laman. Bangenge lang kami. Hahahahhahaha!!

Pam, welkam to the drinking club, tapos na ang initiation mo. Magpapaayat na tayo!! puro beer na laman ng tyan naten. Ika nga ni Jam at Mace na mga macho at mucha dancers, mabibigat na ang tyan! hahahahahah! Ang saya. Mga sumbatan blues, bwahahha (from chipmunk with love) LOOOOOOOL! Back in Caliraya days ang asaran. Hay Joey, asan ka ba! amp..

Umuwe kami senglot. Pero matitibay ata to, walang umabsent! Cheers mga senglottt! =)

Mood: drunk

Shopaholic x,x

2008-06-07T04:49:00.013+08:00

I got a mole on my right foot. I think that explains why I love going out. I hate staying in our house. I'll always ask my sister to go out and go to the mall - even right after my working shift. I'd rather go out than sleep. Hahaha.

I even got this impression from my sister that whenever I want something, I should buy it. Dahil iba daw ako madisappoint pagdating sa shopping. One time, I saw this uber cute wallet from Chloe. Wat da hek, I went back and forth to that shop eyeing for that wallet. I couldn't decide if I should buy it or not. Arghhh, nakakatense, ang sakit sa ulo. Ending, I went home without it... The next day, I was still thinking about the wallet.. Wallet wallet wallet. Stupid for letting it go. Hahaha. Then I got a fever, I thought it was just nothing. Then after a few days, my doctor said I had measles!! LOL. When my sister found out, she said "ayan kasi, pakipot ka pa, dapat binili mo na. Tignan mo tinigdas ka tuloy sa sama ng loob!" hahahahahhaha!!

Since our office is located inside the mall, dream come true! But it's closed whenever I go to work and after working, it's still closed! Di na ko sanay makitang bukas ang mall. So, no choice but to do online shopping? Hahahaha. No wonder, being employed for 1 year, still no savings! Demn. I'm new in online shopping. I go to e-Bay and Auction.ph.

Now I'm eyeing Victoria's Secret Bags. They're so cuuuuute!!! I always go for the looks. Please be kind and send me some of these hahahaha:

(Raki, akin na lang yong ganito mo gerl! hmp!)

I love speedy tote bags noh? hehe.

Aside from Victoria's Secret bags, I also want these:

Gucci "indy" mini $1595 - LOL

Marc Jacobs Leather Stam Bag

(My friend Tetet has one, gerl akin nalang po, please?)

Mood: addicted

Wag mo sayangin oras mo

2008-06-06T03:49:00.004+08:00

Andito kaming tatlo nila Jham, Eiffel at of cors ako sa station namen. Walang mga magawa. Ang daya non dalawa!! Hindi nagcacalls!! Amfufu talaga oh!! Tinatamad ata kami ni Jam ngayon magblog. halata ba? Ang gulu gulu kasi dito eh! Harhar.

Ayan nagaaway ang dalawa dahil si Felly na-empty bat nya kakalaro yung PSP nya. Teteng nagka call ako. Ayan. astig non dalawa, nagagalit si Jam, eh kay Felly naman kaya yung PSP. Hayyy kaboring grabe. Pauso nanaman ako. Yung dalawa nagbibidding na din. Bwahahahha!!

Oh sya wala nanaman kwenta to post ko. Nagsayang lang kayo effort magbasa. Hahahaha! Bukas nalang ulit. Katamad talaga today. Grabeh! Bidding nalang muna. Mas masaya pa.

You know you'll hate me. XOXO!

Mood: Gloomy

Isang Taong wala lang.

2008-06-05T02:54:00.008+08:00

ayun ako epal sakanila hehe, on the way to Caliraya Outing

I'm officially 1 year old here in our office. I couldn't emphasize more kung ano ano na ang mga nabago at hindi. Hay, nakatagal ako sa ganitong routine. And for my 1 year stay, wala parin akong naipon. Pano pag may nakita maganda, bili na! Pag bagong sweldo, inuman na!

First, I'm thankful because I met my new friends here. Sobrang boring sa bahay. I learned alot from them. Lalo na sa panahong masaya ka at kahit down na down ako, nandyan parin sila, kahit grumpy minsan.

Hay, 1 year. Ano na ba ang nagawa ko sa buhay ko dito? Wala lang, ako ganto parin. Susuweldo tapos after 1 week ubos na. Hahaha. Buti pa si Lala andami na naipon. Argh. Katakot kasi magjeep sa gabi. Buti na lang tinuruan ako ni Mia mag MRT at jeep. Hay.

Wish ko lang, sa susunod na taon di na ko ganito. Kami lahat. Feeling ko nakakapagstay na lang dito ay bonding time. Work? Hay, yaan mo na yon. Kaloka. Pero ok na din yon. Sana tama hula ni Madam Pam, yung 2 fortune ring ko aalagaan ko. Happy Anniversary to me!

Mood: Tired

Booohooo!

2008-06-04T03:11:00.022+08:00

1. Tobrex (for my eye irritation) 2. iPod (grey 3rd gen) 3. My trusty lighter (gold zippo na laging nawawala) 4. Victoria's Secret Pure Seduction Shimmering Splendid (kakabili ko lang kay Raki)5. Kanebo 2-way cake (tnx mum) 6. e.l.f. Glow (nagpapabili si rizza hangang ngayon nakakalimutan ko) 7. Maybelline Fruity Jelly lipgloss (thanks for this bday gift Noella) 8.VMV Hypoallergenics my blusher tnx ulit mum 9. Burt's Bees in Merlot (tnx ate)10. e.l.f. Warm Tan glow 11. Maybelline lipgloss (luv it) 12. The Healing Gardens Sheer Passion (gusto ni Jam bleh!)

Wala lang. Yan ang mga laman ng bag ko. Hehe. Wag na yung wallet. Wala naman laman. Haha.

Wala kasi magawa dito. Argh. Given a chance na mabigyan ng Gift Cert, guys bigyan nyo ko from Beauty Bar. Sasambahin kita kahit gawin nyo ko alila. Basta GC don okay? Babaw lang kaligayahan ko. Hahaha!!

Mood: Predatory

Amfness!

2008-06-04T00:39:00.003+08:00

Is this day jinxed? Pudetah, amfanet ng day na ito!! Sana mapalitan ang vibes ko. Argh!! Effing Hating this moment!!

Mood: annoyed

GG - New Episodes!

2008-06-03T02:40:00.007+08:00

Ever since the new episode for Gossip Girl Season 1 (after the Writer's Strike) started airing in the US last 04/21/08, I had to torture myself on looking for some GG Fansites to read the story (since video streaming is not allowed here!).

Thank goodness, I was watching episode 13 - A Thin Line Between Chuck and Nate, earlier this day at ETC (Channel 30 for Destiny Subscribers). Walang kasawa sawa talaga. Ever. I realized, eto na yung huling episode bago un Strike!!! Meaning they'll air the new episodes! Confirmed! Commercial break, they showed the trailer for the new episodes and sobrang naexcite ako. Added na sya sa To-Do-List ko dahil goldfish utak ko. Huhu.

The new episode: The Blair Bitch Project will show on June 3, 8pm @ ETC. Happy Watching!!

I love love love Blair. Pareho kami nagpaka-tanga sa sarili nameng mga "Nate" argh! X O X O You know you'll hate me. harhar.

Mood: Blair-y :P

Pssst!

2008-05-31T05:29:00.003+08:00

Oh I really should have known by the time you drove me home, By the vagueness in your eyes, your casual good-byes. By the chill in your embrace and the expression on your face, That told me you might have some advice to give... On how to be... Insensitive

Bawal Insensitive dito.

Again, sorry buhay pa ko.

Mood: blank

Lutang!

2008-05-31T04:24:00.005+08:00

Later, Lala will sleep in our house. Weeee. Bonding time again. Sasama sya sa escapade namin nila Rockee and Rhia.

Jhamina told me manood daw kami ng Sex and the City. Kaso naman di sya pwede. I saw the making of the movie, and ang gaganda ng clothes nila. Argh. I want I want I want. Kahit yung bag nalang nila. Huhu.

It's weekend again. Time to rest. But lo! no no resting, dapat sulitin ang weekend.

Si Mia, nagpapatugtug ng yukeleleng binili namen sa Cebu kanina. Kanina ang saya saya. Hinayblood kami. 7:30 palang nasa office na kami lahat!! Mga lutang kami. Ayon kumain kami sa Naty's Lechon sa Market! Market! Bumili si Mia ng paksiw. ako 1/4 kilo ng Lechon. Bwahahhaha. Haybloood tlg kami, init na init kami dalawa at sakit ng ulo. Kakanta pa kami ng "It's gonna be luuuurv,, sweeeeet lurrrvvvvv.. ohhh you make me tuwad!" bwahahhahahahaha!~ ang saya ku tuday amp.

Grabe wala ako masabi. Bilib ako sayo Madam Pam (the palm and carrot reader). Nakuha mo ang hinihiling ko! Akala ko jok jok lang. Hello Beee-Waaaay! Soulmate ko yonnnn! =) Magpapraktis na ko sabihing, "Got Milk?" Buwahahahah!!

Baboosh! See you Monday!

P.S. BUHAY NA BUHAY AKO. Muli akong nabuhay nang ika'y mawala. Nyahaha!

Mood: hyper

aja!

2008-05-31T03:30:00.005+08:00

Hello Bee! =)

Mood: lutang

KBI

2008-05-30T05:31:00.008+08:00

I eFFing miss our old office. The old old office... It's alot different now. New people, new environment. It's much much happier staying in Ortigas. It's near Quezon City unlike here in Fort Bonifacio. I miss my old friends back in KBI.

Left to Right: Tentay, Felly, Mace, Jamina, Sunday, Sherwin, Yza, Mark and Joey

Ang dami ko namimiss talaga. Word for the day ng post kong ito ay: "miss"

I miss the horrible balikbayan box na haunted daw. Astig yong elevator na yon. While inside, it suddenly shuts down, no lights. Scary. Sabi may white lady nga daw don. Kahit nga sa office namen. San ka makakakita ng Service Elevator na made out of box. Literal. Kapag sumasakay ako don, dapat may kasama ako dahil one time, biglang namamatay wahahaha. Aatakihin ka sa puso.

I miss my old station. Yung bulok na pc. Yung mga pictures na nakathumbtacks sa wall. Lagi ako nauubusan ng thumbtaks kasi nanghihingi sila sakin. Yung mga basura ko sa station ko. Kaya nga nun naglimas ako ng gamit, ako ata nahuli sa dami ng gamit sa station ko. Lalo na sa ilalim. Our new stations were upgraded. Astig nga dami naman di pwede gawin. Hayyy.

Doon sa Ortigas, mga buhay tambay sa umaga kami. Walang humpay kundi magtatambay sa Marina at sa Migz. Kahit kasi tanghaliin na, malapit lang ang bahay at mabilis lang magcommute kung sakali. Di kagaya ditoooo ang layoooooo!! Doon kahit 250 lang pera ko solve na ko for the day. Eh dito hindi. Ang dami din ng options ng pagkain don. Dito MINISTOP lang ang pila pa eh 4 kilometers. Grrrrr!!

Dati kahit araw araw inom. Doon kasi sa Ortigas, 150 lang isang bucket na. Eh dito, amp 210 isang bucket wala pang free pulutan!! Anak ng teteng. Malapit ka nga sa Serendra at Highstreet, goodbye sweldo agad. Hehe. Minsan naglibot kami ni Mia at naglaway sa Cacao and amfota, 5 pirasong tsokoleyt na mas malaki pa ang choknut, 400!!! AMPNESSSS!! Magttyaga nlng ako sa Hersheys at sa Chocettes ko Favorite.

Miss ko na ang PSE Building. Wala lang. Kasi miss ko na sya. Mga pichur taking sa parking lot don. Haha. Pati mga kalokohan sa Gym don, Elorde ata? Lol.

Hay, parang ayoko na dito sa Fort. Mas masaya kami noon. Although masaya dahil nagggrow kami, pero iba na talaga ngayon. Yun lang ang masasabi ko po. Dahil naiinis ako asar na asar. Sabi nga ni Mia, "Ang bumanga, Tibag!!" Yun na!!

Baboosh!

Mood: annoyed

Ex-cess

2008-05-30T02:54:00.006+08:00

Got this one from Stan sa jabber, Nani salamat salamat! Kakatuwa naman. =)

Before, hinahabol kita pero di mo ako pinapansin. Tapos isang araw nawala ako, hinanap mo ako at tinanong, "Bakit ka nagsawa?" Ngumiti ako, "Hindi ako nagsawa. Natauhan lang."

Sinabi ko noon pwede mo kong lokohin pero wag kangmagpapahuli sakin. Pwede mo kongpalitan pero siguraduhin mong mas mahal ka nya kaysa sa pagmamahal ko sayo. Pwede mo kong iwan pero siguraduhin mong kaya mo. Kasi pag ako sobrang nasaktan, wala ka nang babalikan.

Syota? Pare-pareho lang yang mga yan. Pag trip ka, magpapacute, tapos makikilala mo yan. Kaibigan kuno hanggang magpaparamdam na. Tapos pag nahulog ka na, ayun, paalam na dahil sawa na sila. Pero dapat walang iiyak at ngiti lang tayo. Punyeta, anong silbi ng karma?

I fell in love and got hurt but Ididn't shed too much tears nor did Iask that person to love me again. Instead, I stood up at sabi ng friends ko sa kanya, "Mahilig ka pala sa hayop,hindi mo sinabi kaagad!"

Simple lang para hindi ka masaktan. Kapag minahal ka, mahalin mo din. Kapagginago ka, gaguhin mo rin. Pero kapagumiyak ka, tanga ka! Ginago ka na nga, iiyakan mo pa?!

Pag iniwan ka ng mahal mo, wag mosiyang sisihin! Kausapin mo siya ngharap-harapan at sabihin mong, "Ingat, tanga ka pa naman!"

Masakit pag iniwan ka ng mahal mo. Perowag kang magagalit ng husto. Kahit papano may pinagsamahan naman, diba? Kaya for the last time yakapin mo siya at ibulong mo, "Tang*na ka, kukulamin kita!"

If the one you love doesn't love you back, don't get depressed. Just thinkabout it for a while, maybe cry a bit then wipe your tears and say, "Ang weird naman niya. Bakit ayaw nya sa tao?!"

Pag sinabi sayo ng mahal mo na ayaw na niya sayo, hayaan mo lang. Wag kang iiyak at magpapakagago! Imbis na iyakan mo siya, ngitian mo lang at sabihin mo ang ganito, "So, pano? Paalam na! Naghihintay na ang kapalit mo!"

Who cares about break-ups?

Oo nga, masakit. Makirot sa puso. Pero tandaan mo: a break-up isn't only an end to a relationship. It's also a beginning of a new one and an end to a living hell called "ex".

Helpful Tip!

2008-05-29T00:28:00.016+08:00

Hi frenemies! Working as a "call girl" has great responsibilities. One must be careful on what to say, write and type or else one will look &^&#$%^#). harhar. Let's define each:

Lose (v.)

to undergo defeat
to free oneself from
to miss from one's possession or from a customary or supposed place

ex.

(used as a verb) - I don't want to lose my expensive bag.

(used as adjective) - You are a pathetic loser.

Loose (adj.)

not rigidly fastened or securely attached
not dense, close, or compact in structure or arrangement
the opposite of tight or contained

ex. There's a dog running loose in the street.

So one must not say, "We won, loosers!" or you'll be an instant loser. LOL.

Loosen up! Don’t make me lose my temper.

P.S.

One should also know the difference between "Your" and "You're"

“You’re” is always a contraction of “you are.”

Again kids, don't say "Your ugly" Or else, you'll be loser #1.

Mood: Chill

First Day As a 22-Year-Old Bitter Butter

2008-05-28T03:35:00.018+08:00

May 22, around 8pm I was forced to wake up because of Tustus' voice flooding my parent's room. He kept on saying "I want, can I have one? I'm super hungry na. Don't tell Tita." I got curious and wanted to throw the pillow at Tus to shut up, but thankfully I realized I'll be late for work again (thanks tustus my angel lol). Darn. By the way, I saw this huge bilao of Maki and Crabsticks on the table. It's my cake of Maki. Lol.

Got up, took a bath and my mum asked me kung gusto ko na daw kainin. I was like, "Ma, alam ko matakaw ako, at naglalaway sa maki, pero 100 pcs, uubusin ko? Haller?" So I decided to bring it to the office.

Now at the office, kahit ata bertday mo inaantok ka padin. Lunch break b-day gift sakin ng WFM sabay sabay kami nagbreak nila Jam, Rhia, Mia, Raki, Mace at pumunta kami sa mga upuan sa baba ng Market Market upang pagsalusaluhan ang isang bilao ng Maki at isang cup ng Juice. Bwahahhahahaha. Kuripot.

Here's the pic nung menu nun binilhan ng mom ko:

In fairness to them, you are sure na fresh yun bibilhin mo. Because they'll only make it as soon as inorder mo. Ang bilis nila gumawa and kitang kita mo pano. Kakatuwa nga manood. Pero ayon, kahit anong ganda ng presentation, si Jham at Ria di naman pala kumakain ng Japanese food. Ending ang dami natira. Ayon nagcontest kami ni Raki ng pagandahan ng design sa styro para ishare sa officemates.

So, while eating, kahit maanghang ang wasabe, care ko? Hindi ako nanlibre ng panulak. Isang Large Orange juice lang ang binili ko para sa lahat! Sorry friendships, magtayo na ng unyon para sa susunod sa Shangri-La Hotel tayo magcecelebrate.

During midnight, text a text a text sa mga bumabati at nagmemessage. Salamat salamat muli mga minamahal ko - at sa ibang bumating epal. Go to hell! (yaan nyo na yon, bday ko naman). Excited na makita muli ang College Gang ko. Sa sobrang excitement nga ata nila, text ng text sa plano, umabot na 12am, nakalimutan bumati ng bday. Hahahaha~

After shift, nagtaxi nalang ako. Dahil ang ikli pala ng suot ko, kawawa naman makakakita makakasuhan pa ko ng murder ng birthday ko. Lol. Nagtaxi na din ako para maabutan ko sila mumi, kasi aalis sila, ayoko naman nagbertday ako di ko sila nakita whole day. Pagdating ng bahay, hi hello mumi and daddy, kain ng breakfast and voila, sa sobrang excitement sa bday bash later on nakatulog na ako.

Anyways, usapan namen nila Lala, 3pm gisingin nya ako. Oh em gee. as usual, what's new, 4:30 na ako nagising. Puro "oo gising na" "mag aayos na" ang text ko pero actually extension ng tulog yon. Sorry to keep you waiting La, at least, ilang minutes lang ako late. Lavshuuuu!

Pagdating ng LasPinas, punta kami ng Southmall dahil tapat lang yon ng bahay nila Pot. Confused pa kami kung ano ang iinumin nameng apat. Well, si Noella, missing in action parin dahil nasa MOA lumulutang sa pag-ibig amp. So ang desisyon ng jurry, ang iinumin nameng apat ay 2 malaking GSM Blue at 1 750mL na Baileys. Wahahahhaha.

Pot the Bartender. Noella the athlete swimmer and si Sherla the crying lady. Pot - sya ang nagmix ng aming inumen. Talentado ka pala Pot sa pag mix. Traydor ang pinagiinum naten. Hihi. Kala mu weng weng lang, ayon, naweng weng kaming lahat. Si Noella naging swimmer, naghahanap ng mesang hihigann. At si Lala? Crying Lady nga eh! Yun na.

Sya nga pala, Ryan Sherwin, maraming salamat sa Cake, ayon, pati yung mga lusaw na candles kinain namen, at yung cake, binaon ko hangang sa damit ko..

Click click!

Ayan ang dahilan kung bakit lusaw ang kandila. Nag pichur muna kasi. Hindi ko nman nablow un candle. Daya mang aagaw kayo...! Ang ayos pa ng itsura namen no, pano kakaumpisa palang ng inuman. Ayun un GSM na traydor. Amfness.

After a few minutes:

Mapupungay lang ang mga mata namen, baka kasi may dumaan. Hahahah. I think paubos na ata yung 2 GSM during this time. And ang usapang matino, magkakantahan kami sa videoke, ang ending nag emote ang mga crying ladies habang nanood ng vids sa karaoke. May kasabihan na kami na "ang mga lalaki hindi marunong mag multi-tasking. bobo!" sory sory sa mga lalaki, tamaan, pakamatay na kayu kung clueless parin kayo. Slow nga eh. tsk.! Isa pang usapan, dapat magbibilyar sa taas nila Pot eh! hala baka tuhugin na namen isa't isa kaya wag nalang.

After a few more minutes:

Enlarge at your own risk. LOL.

Happy Beerday! Ang ending, si Noella, dinaan sa swimming, naghanap ng mesang hihigaan, si Lala nagpalipas ng tulog sa mesa, habang kami ni Pot tumutula sa Videoke. At in fairness, kahit lasing, nasasaktan parin. Potpot chose "Say It" by Voices of Theory ba iyon? Oh Em Gee ulit, crayola while singing ako. Amp. No more crying. Grrr!! Cheers!

Natulog kami ganyan itsura namen. Yung TV, pinto puro cake, mesa, sahig, at syempre mga mukha namen. Pero hindi dadaig ang saya. Ngayon lang ulit kami nalasing, after 4 years. sa Baguio pa huli beses na nalasing kami hehe.

Love you all friends, thanks for celebrating my special day. Officemates, Magic 5 (although missing in action un isa nasa Dubai kainuman mga camel) at Friends. Muah Muah! =)

Mood:
dirty :P

Origins

2008-05-28T02:45:00.006+08:00

That's my mom and dad. Today is their 33rd Anniversary of love! Kaingit. I hope I'll find someone like my dad. Super kulit pero maalaga kay mommy. I know he's my #1 enemy. Lagi kami nagaaway, from simplest things nagiging super complicated. Kasi kasi.. And my mom, after all the heartaches I have given her, walang sawang nagmamahal sakin. Yes drama! I don't care. Basta, I know I'm brat pero I luv them so much. They don't read my blog (thankfully) kundi sinapak na ko ni dad sa mga pinagagagawa ko.

We've been through alot anyone could imagine. We're like rags to riches and hopefully not to rags again? We're working on it. Smile smile nalang muna. As long as we stick together. Gulong ng palad. I'm willing to give up anything - but not them.

Mood: loved

Weeee!

2008-05-24T09:44:00.001+08:00

Ang saya saya ng bday ku!! see u nxt time! =)

Walang Pasok!

2008-05-23T04:17:00.006+08:00

Hello sa inyong lahat! Akala ko walang nagbabasa sa blog ko kasi kung anu anu lang nalalagay ko dito. Mga experiences at mga muni-muni sa buhay ko. Andito nga sa blog na ito ang mapait na storya ng aking huling pag-ibig (pwe!) hmp.

Salamat sa pagbabasa. Nagugulat nalang ako sa mga text nyo na binabasa nyo pala ang blog na ito. At ramdam ko mas affected pa kayo sa nangyare sakin dahil sa mga comment nyo lalo na sa Friendster ko. haha. katuwa naman. Kasi isang malaking kalokohan lang ito. From my gradeschool friends to working friends and online friends, binabasa ito. Love you all.

Dito lang ako nakakablog sa work, I'll try at home. Hope to post here soon! Haba ng bakasyon ko, in fairness! Naka leave ako mamaya sa work, then sa Monday, Memorial Day dito sa U.S.A. ay este doon pala so wala kaming pasok. Feeling. Hope to see you all on Tuesday night! Try ko makasingit sa weekends. Hectic sked ko, dami papa nakapila. Entertain ko muna. hahahaha!

P.S.

If bago ka dito sa blog ko, Just read my posts by topic (pwedeng tao, bagay, hayop or mukhang hayop) para mas masaya, browse mo nalang sa right side bandang baba to see my topics.

Kung malunkot ka naman, and you wana be happy, read Prinsesa ng Bangkera nalang. Isang malaking Kalokohan but a must read! Nasa right side din hanapin nyo nalang yun logo then click it to read the blog-a-serye.

Babush!

Mood: Tired and Sick (sinisipon ako ng Bday ko!!)

Thanks!

2008-05-23T00:28:00.013+08:00

Maraming salamat sa mga bumati. Sa text, sa friendster, sa personal, sa jabber, sa telekenesis - alam ko binabati mo ko. haha.

Tnx Jamjam for the ---> greeting sa blog

and kay Mia sa ---> greeting din sa blog

and kay Rogelyn ---> greeting din sa blog

Lavyu all! =)

Mga Jabber Greeters:

Mood: Bouncy

Haburday tu Me =)

2008-05-23T00:00:00.004+08:00

Yey bday ko na. May dala ko Japanese Food, thanks thanks mumi and daddy! Mamaya papakyawin namen to lunch break. Sana dumating si Felly and Buena, at dala yung pinramis nyang cake! HMPPP!

Mamaya pag uwe ko, tulog na ulit. Pagising ko, kasama ko na frendshipsss kuu.. POOOOT, LALAAA, NUNUUUI, makakasama ko na ulit kayo. Celebrate weeee! Dun ako sa bahay ni Pot magcecelebrate ng bday ko inuman ulit.. Sayang, kulang kami.WALA SI JOEYYYYYYYYYYY UHWAAAAAAAA!! =(

Sa Saturday, lunch kami ng family ko. Di kasi pwede si mumi kasi magpapagamot sya. Baka nga di kami magkita ng bday ko. Huhu.. Saturday night, baka gumimik naman with Raki and RIa.. Weng weng na to!!

Excited na din ako sa Monday, dun naman kami kila Mia. Swimming and inuman na to. Ang saya buti nalang maaasahan ko mga friends ko. Love you all. =) Thanks for being there on my bday. Muah Muah!

Mood: Bouncy

iPod Wonder

2008-05-22T04:35:00.010+08:00

TAG FIVE FRIENDS AND SEND THEM AN AIR KISS.

RULES:
1. Put your music player / iPod on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. You must write that song name down no matter how silly it sounds! You may put some lines to make it cooler!

Here it Goes:

1. If someone says "Is this okay?" you say?

-Freek A Leek - Petey Pablo *Hey I like it daddy!

2. What would best describe your personality?

-Your Guardian Angel - Red Jumpsuit Apparatus *"I will never let you fall. I'll stand up with you forever." naks

3. What do you like in a girl/guy?

-Gold Digger - Kanye West *LOL natatawa ko. wak naman po!

4. How do you feel today?

-Foolish - Ashanti *wow nakikisama iPod ku

5. What is your life's purpose?

-At Your Best - Aaliyah *Let me knowwww let me knowww. di ko padin alam purpose ko. First line palang. hahahaha.

6. What is your motto?

-Let it Rain - Jojo *jusmeyo wak naman pow

7. What do your friends think of you?

-Buy You a Drink - T Pain *wahahahhahahaha ganito na ba ko kalasingera!! Astig swak na swak.

8. What do you think of your parents?

-Make Me Better - Ne Yo *naks title palang

9. What do you think about very often?

-A Call Center - Cambio *Astig na tlg tohh, nasa work lagi eh hahahha! Kahit matulog

10. What do you think of your bestfriend?

-Half Crazy - Freestyle *Nyahahahha mga baliw!!

11. What do you think of the person you like?

-Hate That I Love You - Rihanna *nakpucha, dapat love that I hate you. swabeng swabe. soulmate ko ata ipod ko.

12. What is your life story?

-Always on Time - Ashanti *lol Gave you my all, baby be mine.

13. What do you want to be when you grow up?

-On The Hotline - Pretty Ricky *amp call center for life ba ko? nyahahahhahahaha!

14. What do you think when you see the person you like?

-Energy - Natalie *wooo lesh pump it up lover!!

15. What do your parents think of you?

-Wouldnt' Get Far - Kanye West *nay, tay wala ba kayo bilib sakin? natatawa na talaga ko habang ginagawa to. sows

16. What will you dance to at your wedding?

-The Frist Cut is The Deepest - Sheryl Crow *hala ka cant get over? lol

17. What will they play at your funeral?

-Samson - Regina Spektor *sweetest downfall. haha

18. What is your favorite hobby/interest?

-Ignition - R. Kelly *bounce bounce!

19. What is your biggest fear?

-U Got It Bad - Usher *wooooo "See I've been there, done it, fucked around After all that - this is what I found"

20. What is your biggest secret?

-Kiss Kiss - Chris Brown *hihihih

21. What song will be the title when you repost this?

-Baby Love - Nicole Scherzinger *whewwww

I'm tagging all my contacts/friends here. =)TAG! YOU'VE BEEN TAGGED! Repost this and see how the lyrics of the songs answer the questions. =)

Mood: Tired

Happy Burday!

2008-05-22T00:04:00.008+08:00

FELLY! MALIGAYANG KAARAWAN SAIYO!

Jham, ayan solo pic pa. Lavyu!

P.S.

Nais kong magpakalasing! LOL.

Felly bukas yung cake ko ha? Nyahahhahaha

Mood: Ecstatic

Manhid

2008-05-21T01:28:00.013+08:00

In fairness, tumataas na nga ata ang manhid meter ko. Sa dinami dami ng nalalaman ko weekly.

Sarap magpakamanhid. Dapat ako ang masaya. Sabi nga nila, panapanahon lang 'yan.

After shift kahapon, inuman kami dalawa lang ni Felly, pano si Jamina nagbreakfast with her girlfriend, dahil ilan beses na nyan pinagduduldulan sakin na 'yon ang true love. Ok!

As usual sa Trelis. Sa sobrang suki na ata kami don, Php 150 na lang isang bucket from Php 210. haha. Matapos ang isang bucket ng kami 2 lang, isang bucket pa ulit. Alcohol na dumadaloy sa veins ko. Ending namen, naka 2 bucket, sisig at malalaking french fries. Goodbye Diet ulit.

Ayon, pag uwe, senglot ako. Di pa ko ganon ka manginginom, pero at least improving! Umaga hangang tanghali. Buti na lang makulimim at nanghingi na ko tulong sa taxi. Eto itsura ko paguwe:

So ngayon Felly, alam mo na kung bakit BITTER - - - - - - ... ang beer? LOL.

Ang cute ng kalabasa. ano ba sa english yon, Squash? Biatch gerls think alike.

Mood: Drunk

Forget Me

2008-05-20T06:55:00.007+08:00

You said it wasn't going to be like it was before- then it happened again. Pushing me back out the door. Thought it would be for real this time.

Too late, sorry. I didn't even have the chance. You said you were happy, I don't understand. I gave you everything you asked for and I was ready to give you a lot more. I would've given the world right in the palm of your hand.

I could move on I will let go. And then you're gone. Is this how you wanted it to be? Everything you had to say sent the tears right down my face.

My heart was true and that you can't deny. Don't be a fool from all the lies. It's up to you cause heaven knows I've tried. Fuck you.

Nice song noh? Oh wag lalaki ulo. Di para sayo yan. Feeling. haha.

Forget About Me - Little Bit <-- listen to the song! (your media player will automatically open)

Mood: Gloomy

Something made me smile

2008-05-20T06:25:00.004+08:00

Thanks jamjam, natawa nanaman ako sa kalokohan mo. =)

Prinsesa ng Bangkera update:

read: Episode VII (A close encounter with a carrot and palm reader)

Mood: Giddy

&(&^($%^#$^%#

2008-05-20T02:06:00.017+08:00

Lord, I need your strength. Please forgive me for hating him so much.

Bullshit. I took those photos of yours when "we" were together, and edited some of them. And you let that fugly use it? Fuck. Kapal.

Mood:Murderously Angry

Nais kong magpakalasing

2008-05-17T05:56:00.013+08:00

Simula nang magumpisa ako magtrabaho, natuto na ko malulong sa alak. Lalo na't kasama ko sila Joey, Felly at Jamina! Umaumaga nalang, laman kami ng Marina or sa Myg's sa Ortigas at walang ginawa kundi mag Beer for the road, pampatulog.

Si Yza, Joey, Mark at ako. Umpisa na to ng session lalo na't umuulan. Masarap uminom ng beer kapag umuulan. Naaalala ko pa non uminom kami kasama si Mark at nagka-dare. Biruin mo nag tila wrestler si Mark sa public at si Joey nag Egyptian Dance si Felly Ballet, si Jam Papaya at ako Muslim Dance.

Eto ang road trip namin sa bouong Batangas. Ampupu lagasan ng pera para sa gas. 9am ata kami umalis ng Ortigas, nakadating kami ng Matabungkay 6:30pm na dahil lahat ng Bayan ng Batangas nadaanan namen. Jan ko naging bestfriend si GranMa.

Mukha lang kami naglalakad pauwe? Nasa tapat kami ng Shangri-La hotel. Papunta ng Watering Hole. Inuman session ulit. Breakfast muna para di mabigla ang tyan, sabay nagshot na ng Tequilla at ng Beer.

Eto ang aming inimbentong beer. At ayon yung half face ni Rhyme sa tabi ko. Amp kamay ni felly tinakpan aku.

Eto itsura namen kapag hindi lasing. Depressing no?

At eto kami kapag lasing. Wooooooooo!

Tagay pa!!

My Sky Picked His New Star

2008-05-17T02:26:00.006+08:00

I don't know where to start. Dahil di ko alam saan ko pupulutin sarili ko after all. I'm so devastated it all happened so fast, feeling ko I'm in a trance. I used to smile a lot. And I know I still do smile, but I don't know if it's genuine or not. I want to pick up myself. After nung nangyare. After matapakan ang pride ko, after ko ibuhos lahat, wala ko tinira. I want to start something new.

It kills me each time I go home. I know my friends are starting to get irritated whenever I speak of him. Kakarindi. Kahit ako naririndi na ako sa sarili ko. Our house reminds me alot about him. Papasok palang ako ng gate, lagi ko nakikita yung tindahan kung saan sya laging nakatayo, hinihintay ako dumating. Hindi na din ako makatulog sa kuwarto ko. I keep on seeing his favorite chair now empty..

My friends are right. Bitter ako sa nangyare, and I think I have all the damn right to get so mad at him. I don't know what to say. Ang alam ko galit ako sa kanya. Hindi ko alam kung mapapatawad ko pa siya. I guess no matter how great love is, natatabunan din yon ng galit..

This is just another part of my finale. Puchang finale to di na natapos tapos. Sorry, puro galit pa ko. Yoko na makarma. Doble balik and it sucks.

If "you're" reading this, eto muna masasabi ko.. I spoiled you so much to the extent na hindi ko na napakita ang kahalagahan ko, because I was always there for you, na okay lang lahat ng ginagawa mo. I'll make sure na kapag nakita ko na yung sarili ko ulit, iingatan ko muna - bago ko ibigay sa iba...

Umariba nanaman si Jhamina

2008-05-16T04:48:00.003+08:00

Episode 6 - How to Heal a Broken Heart from Prinsesa ng Bangkera

Read it Here.

Trish, tell me where Doctor Quack Quack lives, pupuntahan ko din sya. harhar.

Isdaan Fresh Catch

2008-05-16T03:25:00.013+08:00

Ever since I could remember, our family has a pilgrimage to the Lady of Manaoag in Pangasinan every first Saturday of the month. My mom was strong then, and we were never absent. Twing pumupunta kami don, it's either diretso ng Baguio or diretso uwe. Lahat ng towns dinadaanan. Kaloka.

One time, we saw the construction with lots of statues at Geronimo (oops, it's Gerona pala, I associated the place with Sarah Geronimo haha), Tarlac. It looks like the usual native statues from Barrio Fiesta. We thought it was a resort, pero ang weird naman kung doon?..

After months and months of waiting and not knowing what the heck that was, finally it opened.

It was a restaurant named Isdaan Fresh Catch. Syempre kailangang tignan. At i-try!

uy mga ninuno ni banky andito

Left: That's me and Tus tus feeding the millions of coy there. Bibigyan ka nila ng bag ng pagkain ng coy, and you'll see them all swimming towards you. Kahit gabi bright orange ang makikita mo.

Right: Tacsiyapo Wall. Astig. lahat ng galit mo jan mo ibabato. You have to buy the plato na iicha mo. tapos itatapat mo sa wall na katumbas ng galit mo sabay sigaw ng "TAKSHAPOOO!". Meron pa nga TV na binibenta na ihahagis. How cool is that?

One other unique thing about Isdaan, is that you can cross the San Kilo bridge which is a narrow cement bridge while bringing one pail of water na may obstacles na malalaking shells. If you are able to successfully cross the bridge without falling sa tubig na puno ng coys and come back, you get a free 1 Kilo of Fish!

Everytime we go to Manaoag since it opened, I beg my mom and dad to eat there. Pero ngayon di na kami nakakapunta, mommy's sick. =( I wish I could go back there. Yum yum food!

Best Show

2008-05-16T00:51:00.003+08:00

I wanna watch. Vids here aren't working demmit. Huhu.

OMG.

Tyaga nalang muna sa mga sites. LOL.

My Sun is Now in Somebody Else's Sky..

2008-05-15T03:20:00.008+08:00

This post is part of my fiinale..

block me from pain..

I was never on top of the world... Just high enough to enjoy the view but i was more than happy with what i had. After waiting for someone to love, I thought I was perfectly contented. I found everything I was looking for and I could not ask for more.

All of a sudden, the bottom falls through... I lose the guy whom I though I was his everything. At this point, I am hoping it does not get any worse because I haven't got much hope left. I am trying hard to stay positive, but it just feels like everytime I try to get myself up, something else comes flying in from what was left and I am down once again with my face in the mud.

It would be different if i had to face my battles one at a time, but to have to fight all these battles all at once just tears me apart. In fact, i am just about ready to give up. I wake up in tears because everytime i wake up, I just wish that i didn't.

We all have our challenges, I know that. I admire those who can boldly face their challenges and have enough strength left to fight again the next day. But the fact is, some people just don't have the strength to face and overcome them. I am exhausted and I am rapidly losing hope. I pray all the time for a miracle or even just for some hope... but sometimes I feel like there's just no one up there to listen to them anymore.

To realize, I have wasted my life for someone who does not even deserve it. Not to regret all, because I know during that time I was happy with what I was doing. I devote my entire heart and soul to men who don't really care that much about me, after all.

I have come to realize that I have never experienced being truly loved. Or manhid lang ako? I have fallen in love a couple of times but I have never really felt that anyone has ever really been in love with me.

I'm sure there must be something that I keep doing wrong and I have been trying very hard to figure out what, but I just have no idea what the heck it is. Maybe it is because I care too much, I really don't know. i'm guessing that in order to keep someone you must always hold something back and never give it your all... but my heart refuses to do anything less than everything for whom it chooses to beat for.

if you are in love right now and you know that person loves you just as much, hold on to that person as long as you can and consider yourself extremely lucky because some people will go through an entire lifetime never knowing what it feels like to be truly loved.

that's it for me. I quit.

THIS IS THE LAST TIME THAT MY HEART WILL BE BROKEN.

...because i'm afraid it cannot survive another fall.

Friendster

2008-05-15T00:37:00.015+08:00

DI na muna ko magfriendster. nayayamot lang ako. Nagka-sore eyes ata ako dahil nakakakita ko ng pangit. hihi. Dito nalang muna ko.

Text Tentay (space) ON and send to 2366. Update kita, promise? haha.

1. real name – Marie Christine

3. hometown – Pampanga ko lumaki, QC ako mas lumaki.

5. male or female – female na nagiging male na ata ko?

6. elementary – St. Scholastica's Academy

7. middle initial - N

8. high school - St. Scholastica's Academy

9. eye color – brown or Grey, ngayon red. >.<

10. hair color - dark auburn na dark brown

11. favorite number – 0

13. favorite drink – Milk Tea / Coffee Jelly (laway), tequilla at margarita wengweng!

14. favorite song – Take a bow - Rihanna galing mo kasi umarte. Clap.

15. are you a health freak – no LOL

16. height – 5'2"

18. do you like yourself – I lost my self, gave it to someone and he threw it away.

19. tatoo – none

20. long or short hair - long

21. righty or lefty - righty

FIRSTS:

22. first surgery – none

23. first piercings - ears only

24. lahat best friend – Clarence, Smiley's Angels Team Marina

25. first award – Top Achiever - Kinder

26. first sport – swimming 3yrs old when we had a pool in Pampanga

27. first pet – a hamster he died 1 day after

28. first vacation – Newly born, gala na ko

29. first teacher - Ms. Pia Salameño (kinder)

30. first crush – Maynard Ong (gr. 2) haha

31. first phone number – 0917-510-3867 wala na yan.

LASTS:

36. last song you listened to – Said I love you but I lied - sa Taxi goin' to office

37. last out of state – kung dito sa luzon lang, sa Subic this May. Kung out of Luzon, Cebu. last Feb '08 argh.

38. last plane ride – feb 4 '08

39. last vacation – feb '08

40. last fight – still on the scene

41. last message on friendster – Joey

42. last car ride – kanina

43. last thing you bought – Yosi

44. last thing you ate – Jolibi

45. last thing you drank - apple juice

47. last movie you saw – Shutter?

49. eating – nothing

50. drinking – nothing

51. i'm about to – take a call. please wag pasaway

52. listening to –Felly's voice, she has a call.

53. waiting for – my time to shine lol.

54. wearing – clothes

55. want kids? - not @ this time

56. want to get married – yes

57. where do you want to live? - Somewhere I can start a new life. I don't like our house right now, I keep on seeing his favorite spot in my room =( bastard.

58. where did you go for college? – St. Scholastica's College, Manila

59. what course - Bachelor of Science major in Financial Management

60. how many kids? – Future: 2 only

61. still talk to parents? – livin' with them

62. want to be rich? – of course

63. want to be famous? – yes

66. are these questions crazy? – just bored

67. careers in mind –wanna be on top

68. lips or eyes – both69. hugs or kisses – both!

70. shorter or taller – taller!

71. tan skinned or light – light

72. romantic or spontaneous - honest. faithful. no assholes.

73. dark or light hair – dark

74. muscular or normal - fit

75. hook ups or relationships - REALationship

76. similar to you or different – depends

77. trouble maker or hesitant – don't dare.

HAVE YOU EVER

78. kissed a stranger - yes

79. drank alcohol – yes

80. broken a bone – no

82. broken someone's heart – yes and I'm sorry nakarma ako. hay.

83. turned someone down – yes.

84. done drugs – ***

85. liked a friend as more than a friend – don't think so.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN

86. yourself – yes

87. miracles – YES, and miracle, if you're listening, you're badly needed

88. Easter Bunny – no

89. Santa Claus – no

90. Sex on the first date – ***

91. angels - YES, Kikay, ate needs you = (

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY

92. Is there one or more people you want to be with right now? – just one. and kill "it"

93. Are you on Friendster a lot? - NO. Blog lang

94. Are you cool? - yeaaaaaa

LAST

95. Text message – from an unknown person

96. Received call – From my sis

97. Call made – his mom

98. comment on friendster – from Joey? not checking muna.

99. Missed Call - Number I don't know ulit

100. Person you hung out with - Jam, Ipe, Mace

101. You hugged - mumi ko.

103. You talked to - Jam jaberizing

104. You slapped - Him? pabiro ata?

105. Said I love you to – hay. Ulol.

Joey, Jam, Felly & Mace, THANKS for the SUNSHINE

2008-05-14T03:49:00.029+08:00

Sabi nila, gawin ko na daw yung finale. Kaso siguro I'm not yet ready. I'm full of hatred sa ngayon. The nerve non gerl na yon. hmp. epal? I don't want to be too one sided dahil alam ko I had my own faults, pero wat d fuck?

Anyway.. Gusto ko magpasalamat sa lahat ng mga kaibigan ko. At sa mga nasa paligid ko. Akala ko wala sila pakialam, pero non nasaktan ako, lahat sila andyan to make me feel okay.

Siguro I'm guilty, dahil for once, non kami pa, I have neglected my friends so badly. Hindi ako pala-text sa friends kumbaga parang nakalimot ako? And now I've realized, they have always been there for me. Nanonood lang sa mga ginagawa ko, and hindi nagkulang magpaalala kung may mali na.

I salute you all my friends. Mahal na mahal ko kayo. I may seem not to care, taray tarayan man ako, alam nyo malambot ang puso ko. Ayoko dumating sa point na magkakalimutan. Mawala na lahat, wag lang inuman buddies ku.

Joey - thanks, kahit nasa malayong malayo ka, hindi mo ko nakakalimutan. I'm going through a difficult part of my life, and things could've been alot better if you were around.

(@ KBI Ortigas)

Jamjam - hell, you could be a great writer, the next Bob Ong. Brilliant. One of the reasons I laugh so hard on my station. Prinsesa ng Bangkera is a must read blogaserye. Dapat strong bones din ako parang ikaw.

(@ Candy Shop)

Felly - Kahit grumpy ka, ang lalim mo kausap. You know my weaknesses. Dahil siguro pareho tayo Gemini? I'm confident that you are one of the few people who understands my mood swings, kaya siguro nagkasundo tayo agad. Buena's one lucky girl to have you =) Hi buena!
(@ Leslie's Tagaytay)

Mace - my first friend in the office. She's my mommy. If I'll do something naughty in the office, sakanya ko natatakot. Hehe. If I got a problem, mga tanong mo kasi pang pagulo ng utak. Thanks gerl, in fairness, I'm thankful to have you, pasapak 100 times! Di naman masakit.

(mace, parang ID picture lang no? hirap hanapin ng pix mo nawawala Caliraya pix naten eh! hehe!)

Bow!

DR LOVE is BACKKKKKK!

2008-05-14T01:13:00.006+08:00

Si Felly naiingit na ata dahil wala kami ginwa ni Jamjam kundi magtawanan sa Prinsesa ng Bangkera Episodes. Sooo Funny. HAHAHHAHA!

Kasi naman. Umeepal pa un dalawang kutong lupa. Magbarkadang epal. Nananahimik si "Trish" Pinapasabog ang bulkan eh. Hala, di aatras si TRISH sa laban. like me? LOL. Slow ka na lang kung di magets, kasi nga diba, kindergarten lang brains ng iba puro pacute lang eh? Haha.

DR. LOVE's COMEBACK POST:
I'm Back Nga Ba? <--click to read the post,lalo na sa mga kutunlupa. haha

u can't beat me.

Prinsesa ng Bangkera Pilot Episode

2008-05-13T23:14:00.007+08:00

Please visit my good friend's blog, sya nalang ang naging writer.

I resigned. LOL.

I'll just do my finale...

Prinsesa ng Bangkera episodes click the link below:
----> Prinsesa ng Bangkera EPISODES

If the link won't work, go to her blog na lang, makikita nyo. hehe.
----> D' Adventures of Jhamina Whoops!

Best Actor

2008-05-13T07:37:00.007+08:00

Oh, And the award for The Best Lie goes to you

For making me believe

That you could be faithful to me

Let's hear your speech

*****How about a round of applause

A standing ovation

Clap clap clap. (galing galing..)*****

But you put on quite a show

Really had me going

Now it’s time to go

Curtain’s finally closing

That was quite a show

Very entertaining

But it’s over now...

Listen to the song - click me - (your media player will automatically open)

Trailer - Prinsesa ng Bangkera

2008-05-09T23:22:00.023+08:00

One day, Destiny got bored and made its way for 2 people to meet...

and took Chances...

"Sana kahit magkalayo tayo,

ako parin ang mamahalin mo..." -Trish

Conquered all the odds to make things possible, even falling in love...

"Mahal kita parang universe,

walang katapusan..." -Dodong

And then came Trust... Durex, & Frenzy...

"Naku,

delayed?" - Trish

After all that was done, there's Betrayal...

"Sa wakas! Nakatikim din ako ng Spam,

ang sarap pala at

hindi ko na sya pakakawalan.." -Bangky

PRINSESA NG BANGKERA

CAST:

Trish

Dodong

Bangky

Written By:

Tentay

Produced By:

Felly

Directed By:

Jhamina

Prinsesa ng Bangkera Cast

2008-05-09T05:31:00.004+08:00

Direk Jamina has chosen the cast:

Prinsesa ng Bangkera: (bangka..bangkay..babay!)

LOL.

Out of the Way Bee-otch

2008-05-09T03:51:00.002+08:00

...

PRINSESA NG BANGKERA (bangka)

Written By: Tentay

Directed By: Jamina

Produced By: Felly

Casts: (wag mo na ipanalangin ikaw yon)

Be Pinoy!

2008-05-07T05:54:00.001+08:00

Philippines - 7, 107 islands. Lots of places to go, popular listing from Boracay to Bohol to Pagudpud etc.

Guys, FYI, there's an ongoing voting for the New 7 Wonders of the World. I checked the live Ranking and I found out that:

Tubbataha Reef (Sulu Sea) ranks #8:

Chocolate Hills (Bohol) #9:

Puerto Princesa Subterranean River National Park (Palawan) #21:

Please Vote HERE.

Won't even DARE

2008-05-07T04:59:00.001+08:00

Grand Canyon's Glass Walkway

"The Skywalk will jut out 70 feet (21 meters) from the canyon rim, allowing tourists to go for a stroll with nothing between their feet and the Colorado River—4,000 feet (1,220 meters) below—except for four inches (ten centimeters) of glass."

Yayks, that's one hell of a free-fall. I think it'll be better if they made the steps made of glass to make the visitors feel like their flying. Another yayks! Like I said, I won't even dare. I'd rather ride this:

Swoooooooooosh!

At least I know where I'm dropping >,<

Im Dead!

2008-05-07T03:25:00.002+08:00

How many years? Oh no! I won't be able to get my own senior citizen card even my pension. Lol. I'll die early? eeek. Insurance, anyone?

Life Expectancy Calculator.

Portrait ko!

2008-05-06T04:49:00.001+08:00

Got my Birth Report: (kala mo un pic no bleh)

You are a free spirit and you must be first at everything you do. You want to do everything full-tilt, 100 miles per hour! A great competitor, but a poor cooperator. You are blunt and direct, but at times unfeeling and tactless, especially if anyone offers you any resistance.

You have a quick, bright and agile mind, but an extremely short attention span. Your moods change quickly and often -- you are very restless and constantly in motion.

You tend to be either very angry or very sad or completely and totally happy. You are easily jealous and very suspicious -- you require a great deal of emotional reassurance.

Your mind is active, quick and agile. You are very restless and you get bored easily. Unless you receive constant mental stimulation, you become extremely nervous and begin to act in an unstable manner.

You like to be very close to other people. You need emotional support yourself and are willing to give it to others. When you feel unloved and insecure, you can be very jealous and possessive.

Extremely ambitious, you are willing to work very hard to reach the goals you have set for yourself. Very practical, cautious and conservative, you demand tangible results for your efforts.

You are at your best when you give of yourself and what you have -- try to avoid being a martyr about it, though. You're a true idealist, but you must learn not to be upset when life does not cooperate with the way you think things should be. It then becomes necessary for you to go off by yourself to recharge your batteries.

Oh Ha! Get Yours Here!

Rain

2008-05-03T04:42:00.001+08:00

May - malapit na matapos summer. Umuulan na. It's always raining on my birthday. It's always a rainy day...

Ang sama lang ng loob ko. I can't find any closure. Kung may iba na sya, so be it. Just have the balls to tell me that. Just out of respect. Instead, he just left. For 3 years I have spoiled him. Maybe it was my fault. And it sucks like hell.. I wish one day everythings going to be fine. No need for closure.

One day the sun will shine and take me out of the rain. I'll feel the warmth from someone who will love me with no excuses. But I know it's not tomorrow.

Sorry I used your pic kung makita nyo man, it's so cute. Hay.

Lecheng Kamote't Sungki

2008-05-02T23:53:00.003+08:00

Ano ang mararamdaman mo kung:

1.Yung ex mo, bigla ka nalang iniwan at hindi parin nagpaparamdam sayo mag isang linggo na

2. Nagbrowse ka ng friendster, at nakita mo isang babaeng connected sainyo ng ex mo ang shout out ay nakakapagtaas ng kilay, lahat ng ng buhok mo at nanlilisik ka na sa galit. "Hi***ma" my face - ulol. Kamote, gawin kitang halaya, sungki ka naman at pandak. Negrita!

3. Nanghihiram ka ng pera sa mami't daddy mo dahil lang sa hindi ako nakapagwithdraw kahapon ang dami ko na nadinig. Blah blah blah.

4. One of your closest friend na kailangang kailangan mo ngayon, nasa malayong lugar a.k.a. Dubai at Pampanga.

5. Kulang pera ko pang rebond sa Fix Salon sa Greenbelt. Magaling kasi si Sara. Tiis ako sa buhok ko patay na lahat sa dulo.

6. Hindi ko alam kung saan ako mag-gym dahil babangon ako't mandudurog ng dalawang taong may malaki at sungking ngipin.

Pakshet kayo. Galit ako.

Charlie's Angels

2008-05-01T04:28:00.001+08:00

Raki, Ria.. Weng weng na 'to!

Just Fine

2008-05-01T03:38:00.002+08:00

Nakakainggit. O likas lang na inggitera ako. Or let's say, bitter (ika nga ni Jam at ni Felly)..

Yung iba effortless, mahal na mahal sila ng BF nila. Sa iba, (ehem!) puwede na patayuan ng monumento, or pwede na ipangalan sa isang kalsada, wala pa rin.

Buhay nga naman.

Let it go……

Can’t let this thing called love get away from me!

Feel free right now, going do what I want to do!!

Can’t let nobody take it away,

It’s been a long week,

I put in my hardest,

Gonna live my life!

Mahaba haba pa ang daan. I'll be fine, thanks to my friends.

Ang mga kuro-kuro ng isang Patis™

Christmas is 5minutes Away

Passwords Make My Mind Ache

FACEBOOK

Not back. =(

Bye Brat!

Caught

OMG

Taste of Sin

Nalilito..

Blogmates EB

Imbecile!

"¡Eres el rey de mi vida¡"

In lieu of recent events...

Barado si Daddy!

Keep the Crisis to Thyself

Di to political post, pramis!

Pasapak pwede?

Kontrabida kay Patis!

Showbiz patis

undeveloped...

Please God, don't make this a sad story...

I can see clearly now the rain has gone...

This is not about f*cking love...

Erasin' Rewind...

Napanis ang patis...

nagmaalat ang patis

patis na nagmamatamis asukal...

Noong tinoyo ang patis at nagsisi...

naging suka ang patis. nagmamaasim.

Orange Head

De-Luscious

C.D.M.A.

Smile Because I Deserve It

Notorious B.A.G.

Bilyaran sa L.G.

Mother of Pearl Drive

Shopaholic x,x

Wag mo sayangin oras mo

Isang Taong wala lang.

Booohooo!

Amfness!

GG - New Episodes!

Pssst!

Lutang!

aja!

KBI

Ex-cess

Helpful Tip!

First Day As a 22-Year-Old Bitter Butter

Origins

Weeee!

Walang Pasok!

Thanks!

Haburday tu Me =)

iPod Wonder

Happy Burday!

Manhid

Forget Me

Something made me smile

&*(&^*($%^#$^%#

Nais kong magpakalasing

My Sky Picked His New Star

Umariba nanaman si Jhamina

Isdaan Fresh Catch

Best Show

My Sun is Now in Somebody Else's Sky..

Friendster

Joey, Jam, Felly & Mace, THANKS for the SUNSHINE

DR LOVE is BACKKKKKK!

Prinsesa ng Bangkera Pilot Episode

Best Actor

Trailer - Prinsesa ng Bangkera

Prinsesa ng Bangkera Cast

Out of the Way Bee-otch

Be Pinoy!

Won't even DARE

Im Dead!

Portrait ko!

Rain

&(&^($%^#$^%#